[bgm music to read to]
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2v4If6Uy1W
"I don't remember myself being this pathetic before...476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAh4ltHAX15
I have no motivation left to try, I don't have any patience left in me...476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAiB5cVWgFT
I feel like I'm becoming more and more useless each day.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWZksk6U09a
And I know that i don't even try, but I get so anxious when I think about exams..."476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVhsDMtxgz
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqD4DIdnK4K
"I'm scared of being left behind... forever."476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbiLgaMW2D
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHPX5UPCazZ
"I'm scared that I might give up on myself."
Have I already given up on myself?
"It's rough, it's lonely... and I don't see a way out."
"Time waits for no one."
"I don't have the willpower to change, and I'm a master at justifying myself." 476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sZPTRNvOh
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wLXOz57BR
But...476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfrWXXY865
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAO3wwtJFls
"We all have our ups and downs. We're human. It's incredibly hard to be consistent, since we're not machines (ISTJs go brrrr though). As long as we think, we'll keep on making excuses for ourselves... and that's normal. Everyone does it. 476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxStgXHOpGr
At the end of the day, you're worrying and thinking about your own future. 476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXncexCOsp
A person who thinks about changes, and is willing to change...476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡebyiRFKZlW
Is absolutely not pathetic.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9szYI2Fdw
You're not garbage."476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTG98O5QID3
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6GAgeXlvJV
"Being strong enough to get up and fight every day is a special talent. You never know, there might be someone very close to you doing it... just for you."
I know I don't work very hard, but I hate being told that more than almost everything. I hate it when my parents remind me that I've done nothing. I hate it when they tell me to do work. Stupid, isn't it?
I once told my parents that I would continue to feel inferior, worthless and unsuccessful if I don't make a decent salary in a few years. You know what they said?476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW4hQsPWpkk
"It's okay. You don't need to make money. You can live under our our roof forever."476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnp5ARmr2qh
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXexSaLKHg
I don't want that though. Despite everything, I want to live by my own efforts. I'm a mess, yet I don't want anyone's help. I mean, I can ask for help when I need it, but...476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡktFoZR6ZGr
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMjfuEzpTN
Sorry, mum. Nothing's working out for you huh?476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoP7eDInlrg
You wasted all your money on all the sports, instruments, tutoring lessons on your son. 476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGSWL1cZ40
Your son didn’t meet all your expectations.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xtHLSUgYf
Your son doesn't want to get married.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xWeRfPlWB
Your son might just end up a broke loser on the street.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIsjUD5o6Q6
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPcOkrtIIuE
You know, you paid thousands of dollars for my overnight contact lenses, only for me to be too lazy to wear it.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYSrvLLdqYR
You paid another thousand for me to do that Duke of Edinburgh challenge, though I never submitted my report and ended up never getting the certification. I still never told you... to this day.
Sorry, dad. 476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0F6HeYsFR9
I know I said I'd pay you back for everything you've given to me, but I don't know if I can.
I might just be the worthless child you tried so hard to prevent me being.
Hahaha.
I'm sorry, I'm just a coward, so I just want to run away. Take the easy way out.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA0gReQkTSK
I'm scared of failing, so.
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQW3VtpNLE
But today, too, I'm still alive. So even though I've accomplished nothing, even when it looks like there's no escape, I'll keep going. I have to keep going. I'll finish my degree. If I get a full-time job, so be it. If I don't, then that's fine. I might regret it. But at the end of the day, I'm alive. No matter how afraid I am for tomorrow, I'll have to face it. The main thing keeping me unhappy... is me.
Thanks for loving me. I'm sorry I can't love you back as of now, or maybe for a long time to come. But maybe one day, I will.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj7DrE9weNe
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ7wwmQ8SLU
Sincerely,476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡer4Olx5WLy
Your son Charlie.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNT6CmQbk9
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJLzpyk0BX
P.S. Screw you sis /j.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaSwFkrzglv
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGHBcNlbSN
[I remembered the existence of this song midway through writing this]476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTNnQTjtxw
... And on a whim, I sent a voice message containing all of this to my parents (it's 3am right now, but my parents are on vacation elsewhere). Saying it out loud is really something, huh.476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxg5mjW6EHT
476Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60NfNNkpKJ
My mother just sent me back a hug emoji and "goodnight" as it was the last word of my voice message as well. Not going to lie, I think that's the best thing she's ever said or texted. I wonder if she'll write a long paragraph or send a long voice message back later.
and then Add to home screen.