晚安了,媽媽190Please respect copyright.PENANAnt1LYtLTTL
Good night, mom190Please respect copyright.PENANAEHmzwcrWt3
190Please respect copyright.PENANAdoZJH3vjC7
さよなら190Please respect copyright.PENANAa8IdFiTptc
再見了190Please respect copyright.PENANAhQgMKrf4r3
Goodbye190Please respect copyright.PENANAQ8XHQl8TuT
190Please respect copyright.PENANA83cTER8L5z
190Please respect copyright.PENANA73OAk1RnUS
190Please respect copyright.PENANADE31XK2raS
在最接近平安也是最接近瘋狂的器官
裏頭住了一隻蠻不講理的怪物
流著冰冷的血
它正是和理性作對的想法
「反正結果不會改變」
我在打一場毫無勝算的仗
而這個對手日益壯大的同時
堅持下去的決心也在漸漸消逝
理所當然地
反抗著的愚者總有一天會被之殺死吧
190Please respect copyright.PENANAnrYHgjKiPn
不再期望與作夢的原因是什麼時候忘記的呢
「沒有了生存意義的話
我還是我嗎」
如此類推的自我質疑在心中多不勝數
只是質疑若能得到解答
我也不需要淪落到這等瘋狂
這是一道不可能解答的問題
因為自相矛盾
是矛和盾的偽命題
雖則如此
消極的心底話
自我厭惡轉化而成的自我質疑
的確可以逆轉回去
彷如化學作用的原理
而在沉思的環境下
一靜下來
當情緒沉澱下來
一切也會變得清晰
源於森林的聲音
它們在說什麼
它們的每一言每一語
「這全都是你的錯」
「這全都是我的錯」
其實不難發現
自己為什麼一直在為難自己
瘋了
我早已瘋了
我的思維早已被創傷侵佔
我無法分辨什麼選擇能夠拯救自己
抑或是兩者之間有什麼分別
黑和白
生和死
正義不正義
反正是一樣
結果會是一樣
反正無論怎選擇
結局也只會有一個
我這樣想法奇怪嗎
還是說這樣子想才正常
才合乎理論
畢竟命運和自由只有一者可以存在
而我確實是瘋了
記得那時
在我還沒有瘋掉的時候
簡單不過的日子
在我還未擁抱無知的時候
我曾經幸福過
然後那天來了
連冬天和夏天也判斷不到
究竟錯的是我
還是錯在這個夏天會下雪的世界
我會說大概是太寒冷的問題
記得
曾經有一個為我不惜一切的人
她是這麼溫柔這麼堅強
是這麼溫暖
她的笑容
她的懷抱在記憶中如此深刻
只是醒來後身體有點僵冷了190Please respect copyright.PENANALlJWBs41UO
190Please respect copyright.PENANAfIJDhcm7xK
ns3.142.186.160da2190Please respect copyright.PENANAfIJDhcm7xK
Within the flesh which lies on the long bed, which dips toward the shadow of chaos and peace was absent from190Please respect copyright.PENANAK0bj2zX8UN
There was a raging monster that knows nothing but the word "cruel" with all its vile heart190Please respect copyright.PENANA3ZjH92rPHk
The cold-blooded beasts was the vicious voice that killed my rational self190Please respect copyright.PENANAOaRbd1P5lI
Keep yelling to me, "Nothing will change despite your pain"190Please respect copyright.PENANA7lfCxF8Khi
It is a losing battle that I must fight, yet the nightmare of that day always frightens me190Please respect copyright.PENANAQQvF68N1wL
Acknowledging that one day I will eventually succumb to the madness breed inside me190Please respect copyright.PENANAmEe55Q4G5j
As this dreamland is only fertile for necrotic thoughts but not dandelions of hopes190Please respect copyright.PENANAh56fuxsQC3
One day, I will be killed by myself
190Please respect copyright.PENANAIq52LvJujkThere was a raging monster that knows nothing but the word "cruel" with all its vile heart190Please respect copyright.PENANA3ZjH92rPHk
The cold-blooded beasts was the vicious voice that killed my rational self190Please respect copyright.PENANAOaRbd1P5lI
Keep yelling to me, "Nothing will change despite your pain"190Please respect copyright.PENANA7lfCxF8Khi
It is a losing battle that I must fight, yet the nightmare of that day always frightens me190Please respect copyright.PENANAQQvF68N1wL
Acknowledging that one day I will eventually succumb to the madness breed inside me190Please respect copyright.PENANAmEe55Q4G5j
As this dreamland is only fertile for necrotic thoughts but not dandelions of hopes190Please respect copyright.PENANAh56fuxsQC3
One day, I will be killed by myself
When did I forgot to remember to forget ?190Please respect copyright.PENANAd3BFvkeD89
Forget to reason with myself to never dream again, never wish again190Please respect copyright.PENANAXIycIHNwTO
Yet, the true question which kept me away from the wonderland was never answered190Please respect copyright.PENANAXRXT8xY78i
"Does one who loses their purpose to live on, count as losing themselves as well?"190Please respect copyright.PENANAunydgk5Qrj
Meaningless questions such as these exists only to fill the empty space of my mind190Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9TAb2uzaA
Stuffed my brain to avoid giving room for insanity to take root 190Please respect copyright.PENANAmZopG1M4cy
However, if I really wanted to190Please respect copyright.PENANAE2kvx8Ljhj
I can answer those ramblings190Please respect copyright.PENANAFn5opS6aXt
As easy as conducting an experiment190Please respect copyright.PENANAM5Qc1HLBAZ
Reminding myself of chemical reaction can be reversible190Please respect copyright.PENANA8uqAdGCrgM
My self-hatred can be reversed back to self-questioning190Please respect copyright.PENANAGCuRYfsIiT
I can listen to the sound of truth, echoing from the depths of the forest
190Please respect copyright.PENANAgjjqrfY4TrForget to reason with myself to never dream again, never wish again190Please respect copyright.PENANAXIycIHNwTO
Yet, the true question which kept me away from the wonderland was never answered190Please respect copyright.PENANAXRXT8xY78i
"Does one who loses their purpose to live on, count as losing themselves as well?"190Please respect copyright.PENANAunydgk5Qrj
Meaningless questions such as these exists only to fill the empty space of my mind190Please respect copyright.PENANAJ9TAb2uzaA
Stuffed my brain to avoid giving room for insanity to take root 190Please respect copyright.PENANAmZopG1M4cy
However, if I really wanted to190Please respect copyright.PENANAE2kvx8Ljhj
I can answer those ramblings190Please respect copyright.PENANAFn5opS6aXt
As easy as conducting an experiment190Please respect copyright.PENANAM5Qc1HLBAZ
Reminding myself of chemical reaction can be reversible190Please respect copyright.PENANA8uqAdGCrgM
My self-hatred can be reversed back to self-questioning190Please respect copyright.PENANAGCuRYfsIiT
I can listen to the sound of truth, echoing from the depths of the forest
"This is all your fault"190Please respect copyright.PENANA9qezRzlbgd
"This is all my fault"190Please respect copyright.PENANAu4IB1vvbZx
The results was always there, which I just swept it under the bed190Please respect copyright.PENANAMTCsTWt8nx
I have already gone crazy and mad190Please respect copyright.PENANAL9wvgZdt0b
As trauma devoured my sanity and heart, the pain was so unbearable I lied to myself190Please respect copyright.PENANAlMmIkDF6dK
"It is alright"190Please respect copyright.PENANAW3LDhfYVlm
And it became alright for me190Please respect copyright.PENANAw5qHAzE38X
With the cost of the ability to tell what is right or wrong, to decide what is justice and sins, to see what is the difference between me and them190Please respect copyright.PENANAVmZUQ3wyfW
My says in choices were all it takes to continue on this lonesome path190Please respect copyright.PENANA4xZAgPYqbc
Though, does it matter anymore ?190Please respect copyright.PENANAxeMoYeNnmn
If the past, the present, and the future was already well decided back then ?190Please respect copyright.PENANAZ1er2lM9Fn
As my author said, I could not live happily ever after190Please respect copyright.PENANASUfy1lswHu
190Please respect copyright.PENANAhQFirtmsuz
Am I the weird one here? 190Please respect copyright.PENANA9HnKtYVthl
Please tell me, or is it just the voice inside my head trying to play tricks on me190Please respect copyright.PENANA70h6roIpng
Am I the wrong one here?190Please respect copyright.PENANAMbYeKn8wN0
Thinking that "Freedom" and "Fate" are not things that can coexist190Please respect copyright.PENANAAmpYeNJx5j
Please help me, since nothing I can do can bring my senses back190Please respect copyright.PENANAeEV4o4p0VW
I have already lost it all
190Please respect copyright.PENANA1SKLoFCGlC"This is all my fault"190Please respect copyright.PENANAu4IB1vvbZx
The results was always there, which I just swept it under the bed190Please respect copyright.PENANAMTCsTWt8nx
I have already gone crazy and mad190Please respect copyright.PENANAL9wvgZdt0b
As trauma devoured my sanity and heart, the pain was so unbearable I lied to myself190Please respect copyright.PENANAlMmIkDF6dK
"It is alright"190Please respect copyright.PENANAW3LDhfYVlm
And it became alright for me190Please respect copyright.PENANAw5qHAzE38X
With the cost of the ability to tell what is right or wrong, to decide what is justice and sins, to see what is the difference between me and them190Please respect copyright.PENANAVmZUQ3wyfW
My says in choices were all it takes to continue on this lonesome path190Please respect copyright.PENANA4xZAgPYqbc
Though, does it matter anymore ?190Please respect copyright.PENANAxeMoYeNnmn
If the past, the present, and the future was already well decided back then ?190Please respect copyright.PENANAZ1er2lM9Fn
As my author said, I could not live happily ever after190Please respect copyright.PENANASUfy1lswHu
190Please respect copyright.PENANAhQFirtmsuz
Am I the weird one here? 190Please respect copyright.PENANA9HnKtYVthl
Please tell me, or is it just the voice inside my head trying to play tricks on me190Please respect copyright.PENANA70h6roIpng
Am I the wrong one here?190Please respect copyright.PENANAMbYeKn8wN0
Thinking that "Freedom" and "Fate" are not things that can coexist190Please respect copyright.PENANAAmpYeNJx5j
Please help me, since nothing I can do can bring my senses back190Please respect copyright.PENANAeEV4o4p0VW
I have already lost it all
Still, the cloudy memory tells me the same story every night190Please respect copyright.PENANA9l5x7BrJml
A fairy tale set long before the time I had gone mad190Please respect copyright.PENANAFycSBMETnT
Days without worry and doubts190Please respect copyright.PENANATCXWYjZ0Hr
Times that are as pure as crystal clear190Please respect copyright.PENANAM6yZs1ZSY3
I was happy before190Please respect copyright.PENANA9qcYc8Lvr4
And on that day, when the light went off190Please respect copyright.PENANAS8dWdTQss8
And when you cannot tell whether it is summer or winter190Please respect copyright.PENANA35ivll5cBZ
In that ridiculous world, where it snows in summer190Please respect copyright.PENANAK9pK5hyGGc
I forgot whose fault it was for me to lose everything190Please respect copyright.PENANAidR2ituD5Y
Thus I guess I will just foolishly blame the terrible weather then190Please respect copyright.PENANAJpedz6F7CK
There was someone who love me190Please respect copyright.PENANA1woGLc59x5
Taught me unconditional love190Please respect copyright.PENANAPCdFbCySBQ
She was strong, kind and lovely
A fairy tale set long before the time I had gone mad190Please respect copyright.PENANAFycSBMETnT
Days without worry and doubts190Please respect copyright.PENANATCXWYjZ0Hr
Times that are as pure as crystal clear190Please respect copyright.PENANAM6yZs1ZSY3
I was happy before190Please respect copyright.PENANA9qcYc8Lvr4
And on that day, when the light went off190Please respect copyright.PENANAS8dWdTQss8
And when you cannot tell whether it is summer or winter190Please respect copyright.PENANA35ivll5cBZ
In that ridiculous world, where it snows in summer190Please respect copyright.PENANAK9pK5hyGGc
I forgot whose fault it was for me to lose everything190Please respect copyright.PENANAidR2ituD5Y
Thus I guess I will just foolishly blame the terrible weather then190Please respect copyright.PENANAJpedz6F7CK
There was someone who love me190Please respect copyright.PENANA1woGLc59x5
Taught me unconditional love190Please respect copyright.PENANAPCdFbCySBQ
She was strong, kind and lovely
And her smile was warm like the sun190Please respect copyright.PENANA9WcuTipCpi
I wished to wake up in her embrace every morning
I wished to wake up in her embrace every morning
190Please respect copyright.PENANASMHjQ71Ly9
Yet her hands were cold that morning190Please respect copyright.PENANAOqY5ACEwJP