晚安了，媽媽190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnt1LYtLTTL
Good night, mom190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHmzwcrWt3
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoZJH3vjC7
さよなら190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa8IdFiTptc
再見了190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQgMKrf4r3
Goodbye190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ8XHQl8TuT
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ83cTER8L5z
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ73OAk1RnUS
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDE31XK2raS
在最接近平安也是最接近瘋狂的器官
裏頭住了一隻蠻不講理的怪物
流著冰冷的血
它正是和理性作對的想法
「反正結果不會改變」
我在打一場毫無勝算的仗
而這個對手日益壯大的同時
堅持下去的決心也在漸漸消逝
理所當然地
反抗著的愚者總有一天會被之殺死吧
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrYHgjKiPn
不再期望與作夢的原因是什麼時候忘記的呢
「沒有了生存意義的話
我還是我嗎」
如此類推的自我質疑在心中多不勝數
只是質疑若能得到解答
我也不需要淪落到這等瘋狂
這是一道不可能解答的問題
因為自相矛盾
是矛和盾的偽命題
雖則如此
消極的心底話
自我厭惡轉化而成的自我質疑
的確可以逆轉回去
彷如化學作用的原理
而在沉思的環境下
一靜下來
當情緒沉澱下來
一切也會變得清晰
源於森林的聲音
它們在說什麼
它們的每一言每一語
「這全都是你的錯」
「這全都是我的錯」
其實不難發現
自己為什麼一直在為難自己
瘋了
我早已瘋了
我的思維早已被創傷侵佔
我無法分辨什麼選擇能夠拯救自己
抑或是兩者之間有什麼分別
黑和白
生和死
正義不正義
反正是一樣
結果會是一樣
反正無論怎選擇
結局也只會有一個
我這樣想法奇怪嗎
還是說這樣子想才正常
才合乎理論
畢竟命運和自由只有一者可以存在
而我確實是瘋了
記得那時
在我還沒有瘋掉的時候
簡單不過的日子
在我還未擁抱無知的時候
我曾經幸福過
然後那天來了
連冬天和夏天也判斷不到
究竟錯的是我
還是錯在這個夏天會下雪的世界
我會說大概是太寒冷的問題
記得
曾經有一個為我不惜一切的人
她是這麼溫柔這麼堅強
是這麼溫暖
她的笑容
她的懷抱在記憶中如此深刻
只是醒來後身體有點僵冷了190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlJWBs41UO
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfIJDhcm7xK
ns3.142.186.160da2190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfIJDhcm7xK
Within the flesh which lies on the long bed, which dips toward the shadow of chaos and peace was absent from190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0bj2zX8UN
There was a raging monster that knows nothing but the word "cruel" with all its vile heart190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ZjH92rPHk
The cold-blooded beasts was the vicious voice that killed my rational self190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaRbd1P5lI
Keep yelling to me, "Nothing will change despite your pain"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lfCxF8Khi
It is a losing battle that I must fight, yet the nightmare of that day always frightens me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQvF68N1wL
Acknowledging that one day I will eventually succumb to the madness breed inside me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEe55Q4G5j
As this dreamland is only fertile for necrotic thoughts but not dandelions of hopes190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh56fuxsQC3
One day, I will be killed by myself
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIq52LvJujkThere was a raging monster that knows nothing but the word "cruel" with all its vile heart190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ZjH92rPHk
The cold-blooded beasts was the vicious voice that killed my rational self190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOaRbd1P5lI
Keep yelling to me, "Nothing will change despite your pain"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lfCxF8Khi
It is a losing battle that I must fight, yet the nightmare of that day always frightens me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQvF68N1wL
Acknowledging that one day I will eventually succumb to the madness breed inside me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEe55Q4G5j
As this dreamland is only fertile for necrotic thoughts but not dandelions of hopes190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh56fuxsQC3
One day, I will be killed by myself
When did I forgot to remember to forget ?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3BFvkeD89
Forget to reason with myself to never dream again, never wish again190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXIycIHNwTO
Yet, the true question which kept me away from the wonderland was never answered190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRXT8xY78i
"Does one who loses their purpose to live on, count as losing themselves as well?"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunydgk5Qrj
Meaningless questions such as these exists only to fill the empty space of my mind190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9TAb2uzaA
Stuffed my brain to avoid giving room for insanity to take root 190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZopG1M4cy
However, if I really wanted to190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2kvx8Ljhj
I can answer those ramblings190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFn5opS6aXt
As easy as conducting an experiment190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM5Qc1HLBAZ
Reminding myself of chemical reaction can be reversible190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8uqAdGCrgM
My self-hatred can be reversed back to self-questioning190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCuRYfsIiT
I can listen to the sound of truth, echoing from the depths of the forest
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjjqrfY4TrForget to reason with myself to never dream again, never wish again190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXIycIHNwTO
Yet, the true question which kept me away from the wonderland was never answered190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRXT8xY78i
"Does one who loses their purpose to live on, count as losing themselves as well?"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunydgk5Qrj
Meaningless questions such as these exists only to fill the empty space of my mind190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9TAb2uzaA
Stuffed my brain to avoid giving room for insanity to take root 190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZopG1M4cy
However, if I really wanted to190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2kvx8Ljhj
I can answer those ramblings190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFn5opS6aXt
As easy as conducting an experiment190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM5Qc1HLBAZ
Reminding myself of chemical reaction can be reversible190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8uqAdGCrgM
My self-hatred can be reversed back to self-questioning190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCuRYfsIiT
I can listen to the sound of truth, echoing from the depths of the forest
"This is all your fault"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qezRzlbgd
"This is all my fault"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4IB1vvbZx
The results was always there, which I just swept it under the bed190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTCsTWt8nx
I have already gone crazy and mad190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9wvgZdt0b
As trauma devoured my sanity and heart, the pain was so unbearable I lied to myself190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMmIkDF6dK
"It is alright"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3LDhfYVlm
And it became alright for me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5qHAzE38X
With the cost of the ability to tell what is right or wrong, to decide what is justice and sins, to see what is the difference between me and them190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVmZUQ3wyfW
My says in choices were all it takes to continue on this lonesome path190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xZAgPYqbc
Though, does it matter anymore ?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeMoYeNnmn
If the past, the present, and the future was already well decided back then ?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1er2lM9Fn
As my author said, I could not live happily ever after190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSUfy1lswHu
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQFirtmsuz
Am I the weird one here? 190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HnKtYVthl
Please tell me, or is it just the voice inside my head trying to play tricks on me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ70h6roIpng
Am I the wrong one here?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbYeKn8wN0
Thinking that "Freedom" and "Fate" are not things that can coexist190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmpYeNJx5j
Please help me, since nothing I can do can bring my senses back190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEV4o4p0VW
I have already lost it all
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SKLoFCGlC"This is all my fault"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4IB1vvbZx
The results was always there, which I just swept it under the bed190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTCsTWt8nx
I have already gone crazy and mad190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9wvgZdt0b
As trauma devoured my sanity and heart, the pain was so unbearable I lied to myself190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMmIkDF6dK
"It is alright"190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3LDhfYVlm
And it became alright for me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5qHAzE38X
With the cost of the ability to tell what is right or wrong, to decide what is justice and sins, to see what is the difference between me and them190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVmZUQ3wyfW
My says in choices were all it takes to continue on this lonesome path190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xZAgPYqbc
Though, does it matter anymore ?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxeMoYeNnmn
If the past, the present, and the future was already well decided back then ?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1er2lM9Fn
As my author said, I could not live happily ever after190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSUfy1lswHu
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhQFirtmsuz
Am I the weird one here? 190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9HnKtYVthl
Please tell me, or is it just the voice inside my head trying to play tricks on me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ70h6roIpng
Am I the wrong one here?190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbYeKn8wN0
Thinking that "Freedom" and "Fate" are not things that can coexist190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmpYeNJx5j
Please help me, since nothing I can do can bring my senses back190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEV4o4p0VW
I have already lost it all
Still, the cloudy memory tells me the same story every night190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9l5x7BrJml
A fairy tale set long before the time I had gone mad190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFycSBMETnT
Days without worry and doubts190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCXWYjZ0Hr
Times that are as pure as crystal clear190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6yZs1ZSY3
I was happy before190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qcYc8Lvr4
And on that day, when the light went off190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8dWdTQss8
And when you cannot tell whether it is summer or winter190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35ivll5cBZ
In that ridiculous world, where it snows in summer190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9pK5hyGGc
I forgot whose fault it was for me to lose everything190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidR2ituD5Y
Thus I guess I will just foolishly blame the terrible weather then190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpedz6F7CK
There was someone who love me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1woGLc59x5
Taught me unconditional love190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCdFbCySBQ
She was strong, kind and lovely
A fairy tale set long before the time I had gone mad190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFycSBMETnT
Days without worry and doubts190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCXWYjZ0Hr
Times that are as pure as crystal clear190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM6yZs1ZSY3
I was happy before190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qcYc8Lvr4
And on that day, when the light went off190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8dWdTQss8
And when you cannot tell whether it is summer or winter190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35ivll5cBZ
In that ridiculous world, where it snows in summer190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9pK5hyGGc
I forgot whose fault it was for me to lose everything190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidR2ituD5Y
Thus I guess I will just foolishly blame the terrible weather then190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpedz6F7CK
There was someone who love me190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1woGLc59x5
Taught me unconditional love190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPCdFbCySBQ
She was strong, kind and lovely
And her smile was warm like the sun190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9WcuTipCpi
I wished to wake up in her embrace every morning
I wished to wake up in her embrace every morning
190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSMHjQ71Ly9
Yet her hands were cold that morning190Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOqY5ACEwJP
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