｛初戀殘酷物語—周國賢｝
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如果今日你有一個溫柔體貼，又善解人意嘅女朋友。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCM1KvfyOx
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咁可能因為背後佢經歷過戀愛當中刻骨銘心嘅教訓、感情離別嘅苦澀煎熬，係一點一點咁累積落嚟，一直牽引住佢，慢慢咁成為今日嘅佢。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWAwmbaB66R
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不過，佢過去發生過嘅事，其實你未必想知道，佢亦都未必願意同你分享，就等嗰份回憶好好咁封存喺適合嘅地方，唔好再刻意去觸碰佢。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Lxibn4SIv
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自從你離開咗我之後，時間好似倒流返番去中四啱啱認識「佢」嗰陣。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9wXQNtQFr
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWq1gw3ZX8b
我記得，開學初頭原本區嘉桐坐我隔離，後來班主任先調咗佢同我一齊坐，原因係區嘉桐幾乎每日都喺度蝦我，最鐘意伸手扯我條辮，再將我個髮圈扔落垃圾桶，又會擦走我喺書枱上面畫嘅畫。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq55Vwm0bmk
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但係佢就唔同，佢會陪我畫畫，我哋一人一筆畫咗座城堡出嚟，當佢修飾緊啲線條嗰陣，佢托住腮笑吟吟咁望住我講：「住喺裡面嘅就係我哋。」290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0ST2ZcPuq
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSN2i6f96t
就係佢呢句唔知係有心定無意嘅說話，我由嗰刻開始暗地裡鐘意咗佢。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3SxvLohoLM
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskvf0CMye9
由嗰日開始，我哋關係變得越嚟越親密，無論係返學、食Lunch定係放學，我同佢幾乎都係形影不離，但係我從來都唔敢同佢講出我心裡面嘅感覺，我怕當我講咗出嚟之後，我哋嘅關係就會改變，我怕要再經歷多一次失去嘅感覺。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7I2vDTb4I5
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOEEosJb4m
所以，升上中五嗰陣，我都冇同佢講我每晚都要忍受叔叔嘅獸行。直至去到中六嗰年，我同「你」相遇，你直接闖入我嘅宇宙裡面，你願意接納我嘅過去，令到我好快就依賴咗你嘅關懷，喺你身上不斷獲取我所渴求嘅憐憫，但最後你又悄悄咁離開咗我。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPnxDcVds6
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKExBZIGmOM
當晚同你分手，我唔太相信自己內心仲可以再騰出空間去容納到另一個人。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjRe1TrV1O
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6SrIiIHQy7
分手嘅第二晚，喺你眼中總係傷痕累累嘅我，又再一次意外受傷，不過呢次我冇可能奢求你會再次出現。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaNrcOaIwZu
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUi02GZ1KTb
慶幸地，正如你離開前嘅盼望，「佢」代替咗「你」嘅位置，將我抱起跑咗好幾條街送去醫院，由嗰刻開始我終於感受到佢一直埋藏住嘅嗰份真誠。只係我好清楚知道，如果唔係你幫我打開咗心入面嗰道扇門，我亦唔會感受得到佢對我嘅感情。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6sUkAaVG9
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5k2uoC6jX5
我並冇忘記我同你之間嘅承諾，我急不及待想同你分享，可惜喺醫院留院當晚我部電話並唔爭氣冇晒電，好彩最終我都能夠趕及第二朝喺你臨飛之前，用短訊話到俾你知我終於搵到一個願意照顧我嘅男仔。
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJruDJnjJo
無幾耐我就搬咗去佢屋企同佢一齊住，佢爸爸媽媽因為工作關係亦長期唔喺屋企，後來有一日我媽咪同我講，叔叔因為喺地鐵非禮女學生而俾人拉咗，好似話係個女仔主動向其他乘客求助共同指證佢，我覺得個女仔真係好勇敢，因為一直以來我只係識自己一個人默默咁承受。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsx4EJbbrfN
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUHWsoba8o
而我總係覺得，你只係身處喺某處角落，默默咁守望住我，所以我更加唔能夠令你失望，一定要好好去珍惜眼前嘅呢段感情。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFCKbCVNcE
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你知道嗎？290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQkA4pFoQ5
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巴黎情人橋因為負荷問題嚴重，巴黎市政府終於宣佈將七十萬個情人鎖拆除，或者愛情總會有令人感覺沉重嘅一面，而我當時仲抱住一份執念，覺得情人之間許下過嘅諾言，唔應該因為時移世易而輕易消失。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ77AVGPbQgn
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起初，我一直期待住你話俾我知，你都已經搵到你嘅幸福。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCb6XqyvaCA
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7G153QJrUF
可惜自從嗰個短訊之後，我同你之間再無聯絡過。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqXOKASgGMa
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時間一年一年咁過，又或者你已經一早忘記咗我。
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但原來最可怕嘅係，當我發現自己都開始漸漸咁將你淡忘...
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290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcDkEZsvmI
「遲到喇，遲到喇～」以前中學成日遲到嘅佢，雖然拍拖之後偶爾都會遲到，搞到我會發佢脾氣。不過今日呢個咁重要嘅日子，我哋刻意約早咗好多，喺附近行完街食埋飯先再慢慢行過嚟紅館，所以完全唔使擔心遲到呢個問題。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeehdGXgDDF
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHup3v6jRJ
「遲你個死人頭，你睇吓啲人都仲未入場。」我見佢居然咁大膽，喺度學我平時嬲佢嗰陣講嘅嘢，於是大大力一嘢捏落佢手臂度，但可能佢俾我捏得多，開始冇咩效果...290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNexhpEFuG
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwEfd6WfFs6
「一陣再啲多人就要同人迫㗎喇。」仲要俾佢捉返住我手掌，喺度幫我左捽右捽咁按摩，好似俾人捏痛嗰個反而係我咁。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSIuFSSOnc
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXKEu37ttX
「好喇，聽你講喇。」我挨住佢肩頭同佢一齊行去查飛嘅保安姐姐度，腦海裡面苦思緊下次可以點樣還擊。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkis1dzsMy6
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrxnZM6DY6d
入到紅館裡面，我哋個位置幾乎係可以伸手觸及舞台，眼前一層又一層嘅煙霧製造出一種朦朧嘅氣氛，又有一種令人沉醉嘅感覺。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQnvQMSh00
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxUjtarogbi
「不如我哋影張自拍先囉，好唔好？」因為佢部電話貴啲所以影相都會清啲，於是我喺佢褲袋裡面摷咗佢部電話出嚟交喺佢手上，但我要佢負責做揸機嗰個，咁樣先可以將我塊面影得細啲。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vgL95wCjc
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwh90oFy7z
我哋好似其他情侶咁，擺咗幾個標準姿勢，拎住張演唱會飛，面貼面咁影咗幾張，最後一張佢側面哄埋嚟作勢想錫落我度。影完之後，我拎住佢部電話即刻將頭先啲相send返落我手機度，如果唔係佢肯定又會隔咗幾日先記得。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUw89qOtKqO
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而我就揀咗最後嗰張PO咗上IG Story。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90CgPvd31I
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「我想去個洗手間先吖。」290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRnCrsq7YYr
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「係咪頭先飲得太多珍珠奶茶？」佢拎咗包紙巾塞喺我手心裡面，仲要趁機摸咗我手背一下，正衰人成日掛住抽我水。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡezzfPlZtoZ
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ2qdGrOFFc
「最衰都係你，又唔幫我飲多啲。」我拎住包紙巾同埋電話，一級一級咁行返上去門口位嗰女廁，好彩而家仲未算多人，所以女廁完全唔使排隊，入面仲要好似一個人都冇。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtUrnkOYgp
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算佢醒目喇，早啲入嚟係真係好啲。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cP8PSU3Eg
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9pEZsNEvuF
去完洗手間之後，我對住塊鏡梳返順啲頭髮，整理好儀容，順便睇吓有咩人睇咗我個IG Story。啊！唔記得帶支唇膏入嚟補妝添，算喇都係返到埋位先再補。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiNj9cWNRg
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fhC7OQ5pZ
一行出女廁，竟然俾我遇見返一幅熟悉嘅面孔，挨住旁邊幅牆，擺住甫士咁望緊手機，我心裡猶豫咗一秒好唔好驚動佢，但都係控制唔住雙腳，走上前拍一拍佢膊頭。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVawU8iEiWT
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1ZHqxVbkn
「喂～」但見佢有啲慌張咁將部電話塞返落褲袋。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7bpPil1If
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWajWNTBjQQ
「點解你喺度嘅，你幾時返咗嚟㗎？」我問道。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbF1oNb6Ln
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFUdslv4u18
「…咁難得佢第一次開紅館演唱會，所以點都要返嚟睇。」佢說道。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdWpZiWMtYS
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5YYzMmhSPr
佢講完之後，我哋就陷入沉默之中，只係企喺原地偶爾相對而笑，心裡面好似有好多說話想講，但一時三刻又唔知點樣打開話題。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3mWUbnJLg
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamEiagWdNY
「係呢…」結果隔咗幾秒鐘左右，我哋不約而同咁打破沉寂，兩個人嘅聲音重疊咗一齊。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdo6H1lABh
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWFhGPlEwq
又隔咗兩秒。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaS1DmmASs8
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「你講先吖。」我都係讓俾佢講先。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZErMpDOi6k
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tSnZmSquN
「嗯…」不過可能事出突然，霎時間我哋都諗唔到有咩想講。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnD9MLX0Sbq
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忽然間我內心好想求證我等待已久嘅答案，於是乎我打斷佢說話，同時間眼角微微移向女廁，即使我明知道女廁根本冇人：「你…等緊你女朋友吖？」290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP52jUl5Ie5
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLI3e3f2Qlg
「係啊。」但點知佢好爽快咁答咗，然後雙手交叉放喺胸前，向住門口方向打個眼色，意下之言啫係佢女朋友喺外面趕緊過嚟。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgPPDPzp3w
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaRK7RwTwL
「哦…」290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqnb4w9Zoa
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGgtWmALmS
「咁…你女朋友又會咁慢嘅…」然後我發現不自不覺間我對耳仔已經一片燙熱。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4EbwtRCGg1
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBscirxYYC
「你都係快啲落返去陪你男朋友先喇，演唱會就快開始喇。」佢雙手搭住我手臂，將我擰返向樓梯方向逼我落返去，過程有啲尷尬。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfj35gbUmj
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHOduIYGbw
當樓梯落到一半嗰陣，我忍唔住回頭再望佢一眼，只見有個紥住孖辮嘅女仔，而且皮膚白皙都幾靚女，喺門口外面衝入嚟就即刻翹住佢隻手，然後笑瞇瞇咁同佢有講有笑。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9NR04La77
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCFpyx5JOj
我急忙擰返轉頭，內心卻不禁嘲笑自己，頭先我竟然會抱住假希望…290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSMg5ZUoDy0
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvx8LSgfJr
返到埋位之後，我將包紙巾塞返落佢褲袋裡面，然後翹實佢手臂挨喺佢膊頭度。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5lI9TUmgh
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxCnVNKLPw
望住舞台上嘅迷霧，前塵往事彷彿又重現眼前。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPddRgG3iLQ
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9mam6ocaf
當日你喺球場上，幫我痴嘅嗰塊膠布、290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2lA92KVFqJ
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ78NohdtUdL
仲有當晚喺儲物室入面，同你分享過嘅朱古力餅餅、290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGp6HiNeSpi
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曾經，你幫我打開心扉，等我可以重新感受其他人嘅關懷、290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWA7klxT59p
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXntvnJE2e
同埋幫我克服恐懼，等我可以放膽咁去感受盪鞦韆嘅樂趣、290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkm0mJfAwz
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係你一直拖住我手，穿過黑暗迎接晨曦。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡugz5Q0zruC
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡshdiHpiCJY
如果當初我哋兩個都識得勇敢啲去面對現實，我並冇選擇逃避而離家出走，而你亦冇選擇逃避而將我讓俾另一個男仔照顧。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1b7c7KqnRx
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVh8wjVyWLI
咁即使今日我哋依然分隔兩地，或者仲有可能維持到情侶關係。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxkclTTB0He
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpJIlZ5EFO
不過一旦分手之後，其實大家已經互不相干，而我竟然仲在意你有冇遵守諾言，結果只係換來一場玩笑，諗返起都覺得自己可笑。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmS3yYqkzeF
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡReGknMNYMo
「係呢，頭先做咩咁耐嘅？」佢一邊撫摸住我手背，一邊問道。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOk2AR03CK
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmd7T3gCWoQ
「學咗你啲姿姿整整嘅壞習慣囉～」290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjf0TivdLB
290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApGEY0v0se
如今事過境遷，我終於深刻體會到，當日嗰份回憶同感情，只有將佢哋好好留喺最適當嘅位置，唔好再打擾你，咁樣先係對你最貼心嘅報答。290Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIIODWYUyk8
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只係我都好想多謝你，曾經喺我生命中出現過。
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—全文完—
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