真人真事師生戀《最接近的陌生距離》 - 第七十章之一

我同Miss最後飛的去咗一間五星級酒店。酒店嘅裝橫好華麗，加上紅地毯，又有專人迎接，令我地好似做咗明星咁。而Miss今日呢身華麗嘅打扮，令我好似帶住個女伴去上流場合咁。有啲唔自在，亦有啲飄飄然，真係好矛盾。

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今日Miss著咗對比之前高嘅高踭鞋，本身佢都生得高，令佢身高幾乎同我並排。我有啲無癮咁講，話：「下次唔好著咁高呀。你差唔多同我一樣高啦。」

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「哎吔？原來你咁矮架？嘻！」

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「我係咪⋯⋯唔夠你啲Ex高架？」回憶起Vick，佢足足高我一個頭。

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「高有咩用？對我好未得囉。」Miss笑一笑，翹實我臂彎。

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我真係冇諗過可以同Miss走到呢一步，出入咁高檔嘅地方。呢個場合應該唔會撞到學校嘅人，加上我同Miss呢身嘅打扮，所以我地都唔怕被人認出。Miss完完全全放低老師嘅身份，好自由好自在咁做我女朋友。

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反而⋯⋯我唔知咩事，個心有啲唔妥。唔自在？就喺我踏入呢間五星級酒店嘅一刻？雖然Miss同我表現好親暱，想話畀旁人知我地係情侶，但係我就覺得內心怪怪地，有一種⋯⋯距離感？

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終於到咗餐廳，有一位外國人接待我地。Miss好細聲同佢講咗一句說話，佢地就對望微笑。外國待應好似啲管家咁，動作優雅地歡迎我地入去餐廳裡面。

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喺我16年人生中，從來未嚟過呢啲地方。我以為上次去扒房食飯已經叫好豪，但今日呢度比上次更豪更華麗。環境好靜，客人好似做默劇咁只做表情但聽唔到佢地講緊咩。優雅嘅古典音樂喺空中飄盪，小提琴樂手遊走於餐桌間表演。整體氣氛令我拘謹起嚟，連呼吸都放輕，好驚做錯少少嘢就會破壞晒成個環境。

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外國侍應引領我地到一張餐桌前就離開。我上前就坐時，Miss輕輕咳咗一樣。我應聲一望，見佢企咗喺度，保持高貴嘅站姿，但個表情又變返學校時想教訓我咁。

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「啊！Sorry!」我即刻起身，幫佢拉開張櫈。

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「做男仔要有風度呀。低B仔。」Miss似鬧帶笑地坐低。我就勁面懵咁傻笑行返去自己個位。

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Miss已經睇緊餐牌，我又跟埋一齊睇⋯⋯頂呀，咩字嚟架。啲英文⋯⋯咁深嘅？

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「嗯？做咩呀？唔啱食呀？」Miss

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「呃⋯⋯係⋯⋯好多選擇呀，唔知點揀好。哈哈⋯⋯」我傻笑咁摸住後腦。

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Miss微笑一下，又係一眼睇穿我，就遞咗個餐牌嚟，指一指：「食牛、食豬係呢一頁。海鮮類喺下一版。素食類喺最後面。」

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「然後呢？」我一面茫然咁望返佢。

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「冇啦。幫咗你架啦。嘻！一早叫你學好啲英文架啦！」

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唉⋯⋯我心諗，食餐飯啫，咁都要搵機會教訓下我。好彩Miss已經畀提示我邊類嘢食打邊類，於是我喺食牛嗰版度搵⋯⋯唉，我認得某幾個雞腸，但醒唔起係咩。但既然都係牛，咁衰極都有個譜嘅！就——

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「呢個啦！」我指住一個S字頭嘅英文。

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「哦？」Miss好驚訝，但佢明顯係扮晒嘢。

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「做咩呀？」

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「真係呢個呀？」Miss用一個質疑嘅語氣同我講：「你知唔知係咩嚟架？」

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「西冷扒囉！唔係咩？」死火，我記得係S字頭架喎！

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Miss繼續疑惑咁望住我，表情有啲失望，明顯係不滿我學極英文都係唔識，佢嘆氣就話：「點算呀，你放假之後要補考英文架。如果唔合格會留班架。」

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「咁⋯⋯」我再搵另一個S字頭啲英文，指住講：「咁呢個囉。」

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「吓？」Miss愈嚟愈不滿，話：「你之前唔係話好恨食Tamahawk steak咩？」

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「咩⋯⋯他媽的呀？」我用普通話講。

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「作死你呀！」Miss輕輕打我手背，又忍唔到笑講：「斧頭扒呀！」

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「啊——！係呀係呀！」

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「咁快啲揀呀！」Miss一笑，好似呢個「😊」emojis 。

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仆街奶晒嘢，戰斧牛扒英文係咩？Miss見我一面苦惱，又嬲嬲地講：「Tamahawk Steak ！」

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啊——！聽落係T字頭，同有S！咦？個餐牌上面有兩個名都係乎合呢個條件喎！五十五十，二揀一喎！我望下餐牌又望下Miss⋯⋯頂，佢唔耐煩添！咁⋯⋯咁⋯⋯

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「呢⋯⋯呢個！」算啦，求其指個啦。

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「呢個？」Miss變返教室女王啦！

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「呢個！」我好肯定，但額頭標晒冷汗。

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「如果嚟錯咗啲奇怪嘢呢，你同我食晒佢呀！」

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「牛可以有幾奇怪呀？」

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「點知呀？可能內臟呢，仲要生嘅！」

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「唔驚！落單啦！」

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Miss自信一笑，用女王鄙夷嘅眼神望我。佢輕輕舉手，外國侍應就行埋嚟。

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「Excuse me⋯⋯」

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「Wait ！」我張手叫停！我硬係覺得Miss個表情怪怪地，應該中伏。於是我改口話：「另一個T字頭。」

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Miss勁cool望我一眼，就繼續落單。見佢落完單後，就對我笑⋯⋯而且係當我激嬲佢時，佢嬲到笑嗰種。

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「你以後呀⋯⋯」

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「嗯？」

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「你以後嚟我屋企過夜唔畀你搞！」

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「吓？！點解呀！」

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「成個假期你有冇好好溫英文呀？冇囉！睇個menu都睇咁耐！成日溫溫下書就唔專心要『跩跩』！」

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「車⋯⋯講到你好似冇要求過想『跩跩』咁⋯⋯」我細聲講。

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「你講咩呀？！好囉！咁唔畀你搞囉！」

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「唔⋯⋯唔好呀！盈盈！Sor⋯⋯sorry⋯⋯」

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Miss惡到最盡時成日忍唔到笑，佢嘻一聲又溫柔起嚟：「想『跩跩』嘛？好，一陣唔准浪費嘢食！」

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「牛之嘛！我食到佢地絕種都得添呀！」

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「係呀？」Miss 笑一笑，一手托頭講：「睇下點。」

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Miss眼神落喺我身後，打咗個手勢，侍應嚟到我身邊，將一碟食物放喺我面前。

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「Enjoy your meal, Sir.」侍應微笑，揭起個蓋——

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仆你個街啲牛肉生嘅？！

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「哈哈哈哈！」Miss笑到標晒眼水：「嗱！教埋你啦！呢個叫Steak Tartare呀！哈哈哈！食飽啲喎！哈哈⋯⋯」

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我面如死灰，但好快被Miss笑到面黃。

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「哈哈⋯⋯我被你激死啦。其實你知唔知你本來係揀啱架！」Miss指住個Menu講：「第一次你指呢個真係西冷扒！第二次你又係揀啱咗斧頭扒架！」

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「頂呀⋯⋯咁⋯⋯咁你樣奇奇怪怪嘛，我以為錯呀！」

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「望你兩眼之嘛！做咩咁冇信心呀？你平時考Mc係咪咁架？」

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「呃⋯⋯係嘅⋯⋯」

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「嘻⋯⋯唔得咁呀。」Miss唔再笑我，佢溫柔咁捉緊我隻手，話：「畀啲信心啦。好唔好？」

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剎那間我呆咗，總覺得呢句說話好似有啲弦外之音。似係鼓勵我對呢段關係要有信心。

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「嗯⋯⋯」

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此時，又有上位侍應上菜，係我好恨食嘅戰斧扒！

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「我幫你嗌咗啦低B仔！」Miss見我一面驚喜，佢都開心起嚟。但佢總係甩唔到老師嘅身份，當笑容去到佢嘴角時，佢又板起口面，一面冇我符咁。

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等到啲嘢食嚟齊，我同Miss影咗張合照，開心嘅感覺盤踞喺心間，掃走咗鬱悶。

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