“Alfred,” Batman said, “I need to think about what’s been going on recently. I’m going to Cinnabon.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHVkwGbTvbR
“Yes sir, very good.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1NfuXCsesW
Batman gets in the Batmobile and activates Ludicrous speed, and ends up at Cinnabon in Omaha Nebraska. He walks up to the counter to order his cinnabon food.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1dhgYvVyp
“Welcome to Cinnabon, how may I help you?” Says a bored gray wolf from behind the counter.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0FOKEUMKH
“I would like a cinnamon roll, please.” Batman says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DCtbpu0d7
“Sorry, we don’t sell cinnamon rolls anymore.” Legoshi says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlEFHiOLzHD
“What the hell do you mean!” Batman yells, “This is a Cinnabon!”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKMxVXFtvy
“Sir, please calm down.”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIVibdIVbEB
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIOM4y0iCYu
“Calm down? Do you know who I am?!? I’m the goddamn Batman! I want to speak to your manager.”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYBCvxpYCs
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYBlT2ST2v
Legoshi sighs.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpAZro3zqB
“Gene,” he calls, “there’s an unhappy customer who wants to see you.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCJBS0CHfYr
“Hi, I’m Gene Takovic,” Gene says, walking through the door, “did you know you don’t have rights? Well, the Cinnabon terms of service says you don’t.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjxuKipRp0
“I want a Cinnabon! And I want it now!” Yells Batman
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW9ZWk3KEyE
“Why don’t we go speak over there, Mr. Man,” Gene says and points to a restaurant on the other side of the mall called Cooper’s Bar.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ051b5lY8z7
Batman and Gene walk over to Cooper’s Bar and sit down.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGYkkVJWCh
“Now you see,” Gene says, “Cooper’s Bar has almost put us out of business. We don’t have any money to make cinnamon rolls anymore.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkJL7LHsRD
Suddenly an angry blonde woman walks in.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRaP1op7jU6
“Oh no…” Gene says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfdSjC1wFC
“What, who is she?” Batman says, “is she a villain?
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YJVxXwY4w
“Worse." Gene says, “My ex-wife Kim Sexler, biggest dick in Hollywood.”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOKETBKCGJl
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWcIezXsKF
“WHERE IS AMY SCHUMER YOU BASTARD???” Kim screams and then drop kicks a three year old child.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk9ol6kjupF
Batman stands up.380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhh8JUYCWUU
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ctXgvzvrM
“I will not stand for this abuse and violence against children!” He yells, “You’re going straight to Arkham Asylum.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB9HFpw2qjZ
Kim looks deep into Batman’s soul and for five minutes she stares at him in complete silence, unblinking.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0R1Za8pGyv
“Ok.” she finally says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg8zSzglPQu
Batman is so intimidated he runs away and gets in a taxi cab because he forgot the keys to the batmobile.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhf96lrQKxL
“Take me to the nearest Cinnabon.” Batman says, still hungry for a cinnamon roll.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNbKaGy3Urq
The driver starts driving, and Batman sits back and relaxes. He starts looking out the window, when something catches his attention from the corner of his eye. He has a sticker in the front with Gotham, New Jersey written on it, and realizes he recognizes the driver as a passerby after his parents’ murder.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKBrYI04O2
Batman starts sweating. Is it possible he could see through his disguise? No, surely not! He must trust in his disguise.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4GSwzOdRsD
Suddenly the taxi driver turned around, and Batman quickly jumped out the window of the moving car to defuse the situation.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhf4tPz90By
He walked up to a man standing around with a baseball bat.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3JAyhOREn
“Sir,” Batman says, “do you know where a billionaire CEO vigilante who dresses up like a bat could go to get a cinnamon roll around here?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡemr787n77i
“Yes, I know of a place exactly like you speak of,” the man says and points to a huge tall building in the sky, “It’s called the Citadel, but no one can get to it.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF0p4BKjatC
“And why is that?”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5WvAc929c
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2gjNWAdML
“Because Kim Sexler, biggest dick in hollywood, is keeping it from us, and even I, Rick Grimes, have no hope of defeating her.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR01iZq3PA3
Rick looked at his baseball bat.
“This was the baseball bat of my best friend, Mae Borowski. She died trying to get that cinnamon roll…”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEoH4L5HbDI
“I know how it feels to lose someone close to you.” Batman says, remembering how he lost his teddy bear Cletus in the movie theater before his parents were murdered.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBrUC7KoXg
Batman put his hand on Rick’s shoulder.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgTZZPBkKe
“I will help you find the cinnamon roll, and then we will eat it. Together.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDDDgyjvg7
Batman and Rick began their journey to the famed cinnamon roll, killing the zombies of people who have been deprived of cinnamon rolls too long.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡztDr1OZZKj
Suddenly a man who neither Batman nor Rick had ever seen before ran up to them.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQS2yLTbskI
“Hey, Batman!” He yelled excitedly, “remember me?”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzpECk1fbY
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jd3Sbncff
“What, no,” Batman says, “I’ve never seen you before in my life.”
“From the taxi cab earlier, remember?” he said, disappointed.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy5BMWQv3sD
“No, the guy from the taxi cab looked way different and scarier. You look like you probably use 4chan.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvAiNAJkSf
He crossed his arms.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vjYKjujoo
“My name Jeff,” Jeff says, “and you will take me with you.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIi9oDfqx8
“Fine whatever but you’re stupid.” Batman says, and Batman, Jeff, and Rick finally reach the Citadel and spend 10 hours going up elevators when the elevator stops. The door opens into a small chamber and they walk in, and Rick’s bat and Batman’s batarangs and Jeff’s taxi keys are pulled away from them.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQp0wL4q4Y
Lightning shot out of the walls and struck their weapons, and they began to glow blue. They picked up their weapons and the door opened up to reveal an army of Amy Schumer clones, all screaming terrible jokes about men as loud as they could.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpc101VwkB
Rick Grimes looked at his bat, and remembered the last time he came here. He remembered seeing Mae ripped apart by Amy Schumer right in front of his eyes. He slowly looked up and Heartbreaker by Pat Benetar began playing over speakers on loop.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd8ZaK5d9dA
“This time…it’s personal.” He says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRbYeND69Wu
They rush into combat, all fighting valiantly. Jeff slices through Amy clones effortlessly with his key, Batman’s batarang becomes an Amy Schumer seeking weapon of destruction, and Rick obliterates each clone who attacks him with a single blow from his bat. They quickly begin making their way through the massive crowd.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBufRbGQ4Fe
“Don’t Look Up is the name of the movie? More like don’t look down the barrel of Alec Baldwin’s shotgun!” Screams one of the Schumers and punches Batman in the face, knocking him down to the ground. Jeff tries to stab her but she yells “My husband goes down on me, or as he calls it Squid Game, so he’s in my Nightmare Alley, my House of Gucci, I say C’mon C’mon, he goes tick tick BOOM, he Belfast. I say get off my Dune and that’s how our son was born.” and Jeff is so shocked at how horrible what he just heard is that he drops his key and starts crying.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOiyCxgZ1T
“Impossible, it can’t be!” Rick yells, “It’s the real Amy Schumer!”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bjI2qt2oW
“Then the only way we can beat her,” Jeff says, “is by telling a joke so great she can’t possibly go on!”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jMbfuoRz4
“Knock knock!” Yells Batman.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZwXTtVj29
“Who’s there?” Says Amy Schumer.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTtdQdObsQ
“Doctor.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvutFFEXo5W
Amy grins psychotically, like a murderer stalking their victim.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fZ2gS9SBu
“Oh, that’s alright!” She yells, “We don’t need a doctor, the ambulance already showed up!”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzyQrkD1mQl
Batman and Jeff scream in agony at how quickly and terribly she defused his joke.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpjjV9L9oT
Rick had other plans. Suddenly they felt the temperature drop from 90 degrees to 76 degrees, and Amy Schumer’s smile faded.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDTNXxZHDL
“No! Not 76 degrees, anything but that!” Amy yelled, “The optimal temperature for comedic timing!”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgNusbW0Ob3
Rick stands 50-80 centimeters from her and raises one of his arms straight upward at a fifteen degree angle from his body, setting up all the conditions perfectly for ideal humor.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpjfxheFbt5
Amy screeches louder than any human ever has before while Rick states and spells his name, provides a brief synopsis of the joke including the specific times she’ll laugh, and spells out his name a second time.
“Knock knock.” Rick says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPujRXkERD
“Wh-who’s there?”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpYe32R9kSG
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3y26PZhoA
“Banana.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGTvbVi5NM
“Banano who?”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQKPKYl9qtc
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAU3rUQT0zE
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyuGvxJnVb
“Banana.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYffXpGFPwm
“Banano who?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡytSCsVAUib
“Knock knock.”
“Who’s there?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqEV39UNURu
“Banana.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDCFNkjfacM
“Banano who?”
“Orange.”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKj7DvdoYWG
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtHEoDBeP9
“Orange who?”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRe8bgiqk02
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm3KIYZBMch
“Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsA8rrE9Gxn
Amy’s heart stops, and she falls to the ground dead as Heartbreaker by Pat Benetar finally stops.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AkhizU2Fd
“I’m doney,” Rick says, “with the funny.”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZgHgQZvVU7
They all look at each other, and nod their heads in agreement, and wade through the corpses of Amy Schumer to the huge metal door.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9K6lbIYwk
Suddenly it opens into a huge room with Kim Sexler, biggest dick in hollywood, standing in the middle, and at the end the final cinnamon roll.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBR8Ta3Mrn
“So, you three killed Amy Schumer?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtS9JSNRUM
“Y-yes.” Batman says, already feeling intimidated again.
“...Ok.” Kim says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgqRzMLSWtU
All three of them almost start crying out of fear, but keep themselves composed.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YOtZS9VRL
They each begin attacking from different angles, but she expertly dodges each hit.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5R2tMr4CF7
Finally, Rick’s bat connects with her torso but the bat explodes, throwing Rick back.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDelhwOmWQG
“H-how?” He asks.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlEnRGGa7Tb
“Nanomachines, son.” Kim says with a smirk and then breaks his back, killing him.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2eWyiAMIOn
“NO!” Jeff yells and rushes at her.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCRi1WaGsVO
Without even a thought Kim hits him over the head with a cup that says “World’s 2nd Best TV Executive” and Jeff slips and hits his head and dies.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG8fh6B1Lp0
Recognizing he has no chance of ever winning, Batman quickly shuffles back away from her in terror, when he remembers what his Uncle Ben told him all those years ago.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWj3dk08zCV
“Memes, Bruce.” Ben said, “Memes are the DNA of the soul. With great power comes great responsibility. When life gives you lemons, burn life’s house down! Do you know who ate all the donuts?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskIgpJMXHX
Inspired by his Uncle’s wise words, he was able to catch Kim Sexler’s attack.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1w6WDcmag
They exchanged punches so quickly that it was impossible for the naked eye to detect, each tanking every single blow. Batman knew what he must do to defeat Kim and finally get that cinnamon roll, he must break his one and only rule. Batman takes out a Desert Eagle and shoots Kim through the face.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKaVTNWsLI
“I, I….” Kim says, struggling to stay alive, “this is…chicanery.” And then she drops dead.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgWRSgumzM
Finally, nothing stood between Batman and his cinnamon roll. All this work, all this violence, all this bloodshed, this is what it was for. He slowly walked towards it, chills going down his spine just thinking about it.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUI4ke0fTAc
"I'm sorry we couldn't eat it together like I wanted, Rick," Batman says, "but I will eat it for the both of us."
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQf93HjNSzv
Suddenly Legoshi picked up the cinnamon roll and ate it.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxizsTe12C
“WHAT?” Screamed Batman.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8Go9uf1yZ
“Welcome to Cinnabon, how may I help you?” Legoshi says.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2VVBR3IT5a
“P-please,” Batman says, “I just want a cinnamon roll.”380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7qH4Mgtm3v
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmbOBWlFZ50
“Sir, I already told you we’re out of cinnamon rolls. Do I need to call my manager again?”
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgREsT60bm
Batman slowly fell to his knees and then onto his side, and began crying on the floor.
380Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmdLwhpfnb
THE END.
ns18.222.166.40da2
然後按「加至主畫面」