
「去哪?」323Please respect copyright.PENANACeH1HwO7nV
323Please respect copyright.PENANAZsCtvdvWY3
「急事。」323Please respect copyright.PENANAWRIWUGC1un
323Please respect copyright.PENANAiwP3uHaswq
「你不吃晚餐?」323Please respect copyright.PENANAsP5BlRnGOQ
323Please respect copyright.PENANAky1o6ixlKa
我沒應答,逕自出門。323Please respect copyright.PENANA8EY6ZVUItb
323Please respect copyright.PENANAe5RlwRhMWN
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手,不協調感令我忐忑不安。323Please respect copyright.PENANAP14i9lQ6wb
323Please respect copyright.PENANAdz7TChrT9B
難以言喻的鬱悶。323Please respect copyright.PENANAV6V1qyuel8
323Please respect copyright.PENANA8qSvfbOStX
長嘆。323Please respect copyright.PENANA1gHDsJuo5b
323Please respect copyright.PENANApdw1Gfkjid
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。323Please respect copyright.PENANANec1LuJLNr
323Please respect copyright.PENANAaQL8kpc6pM
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品,熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按,然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉,過目即忘。323Please respect copyright.PENANAacxhqAVuED
323Please respect copyright.PENANA2ixxXIfz3B
「不需要贈品?」她驀地抬眼,與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎?323Please respect copyright.PENANAei5her7Joq
323Please respect copyright.PENANACV6FFR08ph
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口,連忙接過香菸和肉乾。323Please respect copyright.PENANAIDqBftLvZt
323Please respect copyright.PENANAT60kURtMlQ
她假笑,沒再搭理我,拿起抹布四處抹。323Please respect copyright.PENANAUobAuIu4c1
323Please respect copyright.PENANAHFxfCGAqs9
我走出光線充足的便利店,重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。323Please respect copyright.PENANAKOaaDbu0de
323Please respect copyright.PENANACkStCNFVxU
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑,另一種不安。323Please respect copyright.PENANA33f2pZcC9G
323Please respect copyright.PENANAVV5WpZTFkf
櫥窗五光十色,路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序,不約而同在紅色燈號前止住,然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇,一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣,不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。323Please respect copyright.PENANAtcyhZ6jCET
323Please respect copyright.PENANAAOrrsQ1nTw
心血來潮,我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。323Please respect copyright.PENANAIbEMI4yhmD
323Please respect copyright.PENANA0uXUQ6yl3k
污水,雜物,廚餘,鼠餌,坑渠。323Please respect copyright.PENANADvE1wODlLN
323Please respect copyright.PENANAQJM40aFivz
髒,亂,腐,毒,臭。323Please respect copyright.PENANATro0NZgfYF
323Please respect copyright.PENANAYHDsTuOCxO
為何要到這種地方來?不是捷徑,不知盡頭何處,不懷目的……323Please respect copyright.PENANA0jgECqz8A4
323Please respect copyright.PENANAhLSPCveqAN
小巷盡處是另一小巷,盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路,走又走。不停前行,像是正在找出口;絕不回頭,像是不打算找到真正出口。323Please respect copyright.PENANA0fVoYdxzuW
323Please respect copyright.PENANASXoLBNmvH0
厭煩日常走過的路,不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去,其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇,實質一切已成定局。那是大街,這是小巷。大街在明,小巷在暗。大街繁華,小巷冷清。323Please respect copyright.PENANAHCrcGEBZjD
323Please respect copyright.PENANAiqvv36kaJX
註定的。323Please respect copyright.PENANA5rDZ85F1uW
323Please respect copyright.PENANAELgC3zlq2P
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼?我不相信,亦不願輕言不相信。323Please respect copyright.PENANArGBEYKdHE0
323Please respect copyright.PENANAs4eiJjlFYL
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。323Please respect copyright.PENANAFsYj7AHTaC
323Please respect copyright.PENANAPwRloZihzq
停步。猶疑。323Please respect copyright.PENANAqtOfweXBD0
323Please respect copyright.PENANAIctAC3U8UO
惻隱?慈悲?然後呢?根本沒有然後,因為我自顧不暇。323Please respect copyright.PENANAbdGfRbpYvN
323Please respect copyright.PENANAdRQnEBWygB
轉身。323Please respect copyright.PENANAXs6cnA5TtZ
323Please respect copyright.PENANApKticc7qo1
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。323Please respect copyright.PENANA1kvGbTRTtd
323Please respect copyright.PENANAeTQijtIMRM
我回身走去。323Please respect copyright.PENANAGVAmLDf2Qv
323Please respect copyright.PENANAvhODl2q0cn
惻隱?慈悲?不,好奇罷。323Please respect copyright.PENANATi3iuNApoY
323Please respect copyright.PENANArtx8xFYAds
把小狗抱入懷內。323Please respect copyright.PENANApBGhKG3hrA
323Please respect copyright.PENANAOpB6Iw3pE3
「暖和沒?」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。323Please respect copyright.PENANA42jRFG6jJT
323Please respect copyright.PENANAhJVTxYxVeU
陣風從後疾過,寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。323Please respect copyright.PENANAvYmiPxJ7qJ
323Please respect copyright.PENANABEg7ym2EpC
海風?海濱公園步道?323Please respect copyright.PENANA1g1tykyy4D
323Please respect copyright.PENANARvVCnY88QG
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答,但我需要溜達原因。323Please respect copyright.PENANAyIBOzXBc25
323Please respect copyright.PENANAMIc0pyN90P
多拐兩個彎,我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來,恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄,純淨,圓滿。323Please respect copyright.PENANA5Wk97AiQI5
323Please respect copyright.PENANAlryIoSTD95
「看!這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。323Please respect copyright.PENANAkWmmqvyNpD
323Please respect copyright.PENANAk68MWBny6w
汪——牠回答,但沒有依指示抬頭。323Please respect copyright.PENANAmWAMuvY5VE
323Please respect copyright.PENANAocRHOyNSDz
「找個好地方坐坐吧!」為免小狗中途跑掉,我微微拉下外套拉鏈,把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗,甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部,方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹:「乖。」323Please respect copyright.PENANAg7O9z2WSU9
323Please respect copyright.PENANAma757FKw9f
銀月清冷,步道冷清,寧靜。心跳規律,呼吸有序,乏味。回憶很多,未知更多,迷惘。323Please respect copyright.PENANAfEQOcRSbLo
323Please respect copyright.PENANAlIG1ezeYOQ
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller,跌了幾跤,膝蓋流血。明明怕血,明明怕痛,偏偏為保面子而強說無事,硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片,痛得要命,不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月,九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下,拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢,報答牠聽我發牢騷。323Please respect copyright.PENANAuOxARUROdF
323Please respect copyright.PENANAcTtI3dmlQO
「留醫期間,我生氣朋友們不來探望我,打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後,我忙於學校課業,忘記致電他們,然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們,已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸,一吸一呼,虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了,無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過,不是說忘記就可以忘記。」323Please respect copyright.PENANAtZBs1I8HeD
323Please respect copyright.PENANAtjlvIMTTxa
記憶零碎,思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多,無奈腦袋運轉不來,沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。323Please respect copyright.PENANAdL2h8LiL3H
323Please respect copyright.PENANAY7H9H1QOCa
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味,舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊,甚至舔到小小鼻頭。323Please respect copyright.PENANAdcpH0NlSVA
323Please respect copyright.PENANApV3T4asa2i
我笑,笑牠傻氣可愛。323Please respect copyright.PENANAnpF0NxrqBl
323Please respect copyright.PENANADBANRolvF4
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。323Please respect copyright.PENANAsLv7Q3pvJy
323Please respect copyright.PENANAx8hoHo0vGI
鬱悶何來?323Please respect copyright.PENANA5kGN7RlF9J
323Please respect copyright.PENANAn7yJPWbmOI
學業壓力?愛情煩惱?家庭不和?323Please respect copyright.PENANAsAf32D2RmB
323Please respect copyright.PENANAOLf7QAGzae
也許統統都是,也許統統不是。323Please respect copyright.PENANAXpSVNLP41x
323Please respect copyright.PENANARY4czxB3mP
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。323Please respect copyright.PENANADl6fVClRis
323Please respect copyright.PENANAPGRWmX7HLP
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。323Please respect copyright.PENANAGNmsS3cNEe
323Please respect copyright.PENANAdzv9GBwGS2
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。323Please respect copyright.PENANAeq6cjmXXdE
323Please respect copyright.PENANAdVPLNYahAR
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼,我彈走菸屁股,將牠從懷裡抽出,來個深深擁抱。323Please respect copyright.PENANApeIs9SBZEc
323Please respect copyright.PENANAys05w52WyM
然後呢?根本沒有然後。323Please respect copyright.PENANAlPLRU2o347
323Please respect copyright.PENANAvgLqIz1LTS
我輕輕放下小狗,動身邁步離開。323Please respect copyright.PENANA97ACW5rWiz
323Please respect copyright.PENANArAr4ErXNzu
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾,自然而然不會跟上來。323Please respect copyright.PENANAb0GUl0K90m
註:此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
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