「去哪？」401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsJoC4GRT4
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCVKFkFG9Wk
「急事。」401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkn3mfuPDD
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8MaxMYdnBA
「你不吃晚餐？」401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmdsF2XDHTt
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGkjR3MdbiD
我沒應答，逕自出門。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM126bjZkUQ
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbnXMoDorD
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手，不協調感令我忐忑不安。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDACwm47jU
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOjT2SH7BLY
難以言喻的鬱悶。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9uISaTiGNc
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gNW99i0Xk
長嘆。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoDfMbXXEjm
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEwON7zYt6J
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2W40ZLnc4v
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnUlerh178N
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品，熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按，然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉，過目即忘。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLnHSl65Ol
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlIk4V0fNk
「不需要贈品？」她驀地抬眼，與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎？401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoBJYJ1iLw
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvWW0ZatSL
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口，連忙接過香菸和肉乾。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQT7Um8APp
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHTyaUaJeh
她假笑，沒再搭理我，拿起抹布四處抹。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUe6Pvrpjsx
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkh9QEWFHn9
我走出光線充足的便利店，重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcL6mkGQUq
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs6delDrwYb
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑，另一種不安。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFLyZooAs8N
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpBNV7HvS7
櫥窗五光十色，路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序，不約而同在紅色燈號前止住，然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇，一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣，不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuCL3Wj4LmD
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rhrMJQal9
心血來潮，我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvBkejMWym
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRA1Ma9Y7J
污水，雜物，廚餘，鼠餌，坑渠。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq06KjDsP5v
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtrpDisbvcW
髒，亂，腐，毒，臭。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgtYAWDLZ4i
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoV9wBD89a
為何要到這種地方來？不是捷徑，不知盡頭何處，不懷目的……401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCvn03P4Nd
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCpjO4Fj8Y
小巷盡處是另一小巷，盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路，走又走。不停前行，像是正在找出口；絕不回頭，像是不打算找到真正出口。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxT81Mpjihp
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkfurLbBHst
厭煩日常走過的路，不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去，其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇，實質一切已成定局。那是大街，這是小巷。大街在明，小巷在暗。大街繁華，小巷冷清。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4MgsgjDwY5
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kdWBUpiZO
註定的。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkxekri6R3
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIROzMdxG38
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼？我不相信，亦不願輕言不相信。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrwdHpqMiNo
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJVMqjUnN2
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOyJ8J6dI4q
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9nSvnWXCps
停步。猶疑。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuXTRzaG61
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoR0E99VUpT
惻隱？慈悲？然後呢？根本沒有然後，因為我自顧不暇。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgh7yfwyIk
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6pMVAB5pzh
轉身。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVqZ6vU1MM
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHso69a5pSK
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jT3jNHog1
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67c6mkkiyH
我回身走去。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9RrcuGCsAd
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVNYIYbfN9
惻隱？慈悲？不，好奇罷。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDWgA1Mw24
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZReguZViO
把小狗抱入懷內。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUK8G5gyRYR
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05vhv1yFVd
「暖和沒？」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeNKpGlU7s
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfYHYmetHOc
陣風從後疾過，寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYi3ooMjisU
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡluj7ydG55A
海風？海濱公園步道？401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hat4ipXET
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdgTbwxXKxJ
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答，但我需要溜達原因。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMr6xtagY5
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzm5K2FE8Qq
多拐兩個彎，我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來，恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄，純淨，圓滿。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmOIiLYjdc
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuKmH0V57x
「看！這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hfSJKnaxb
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxp1snlO2Tc
汪——牠回答，但沒有依指示抬頭。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SKTXFUHvB
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0K1wpjIZR
「找個好地方坐坐吧！」為免小狗中途跑掉，我微微拉下外套拉鏈，把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗，甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部，方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹：「乖。」401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSBqqYKsL72
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWQ1X3m73T
銀月清冷，步道冷清，寧靜。心跳規律，呼吸有序，乏味。回憶很多，未知更多，迷惘。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmNU2vQkAO5
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd6JuZLJkIi
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller，跌了幾跤，膝蓋流血。明明怕血，明明怕痛，偏偏為保面子而強說無事，硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片，痛得要命，不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月，九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下，拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢，報答牠聽我發牢騷。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRkpU0eHrq
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKikDfnMbXg
「留醫期間，我生氣朋友們不來探望我，打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後，我忙於學校課業，忘記致電他們，然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們，已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸，一吸一呼，虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了，無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過，不是說忘記就可以忘記。」401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7HIFcffOki
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9mNOZvMTCU
記憶零碎，思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多，無奈腦袋運轉不來，沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXeH4e1C4h
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9AhYVmArP
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味，舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊，甚至舔到小小鼻頭。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoREDTf0ex
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCT4JNbvWKr
我笑，笑牠傻氣可愛。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhBuqJeJSx
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd0OWJKJXJv
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHq8CdFXclI
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB9o1divfxj
鬱悶何來？401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJhrZoHal5
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXgLgRBOMX
學業壓力？愛情煩惱？家庭不和？401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWByduZTbPd
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95St2lT9sF
也許統統都是，也許統統不是。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfBbhzE6Wv
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvfJEDUQuEr
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRBp0yO1OaT
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhvnONhgUX
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4mBtr3sHW
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVn52hJXw5k
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwjIJfsgv6s
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2hL2lBCkK
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼，我彈走菸屁股，將牠從懷裡抽出，來個深深擁抱。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6DtGcqneH
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrDDTZXXzxo
然後呢？根本沒有然後。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAkoXGN0Pb9
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh68xbMFdCy
我輕輕放下小狗，動身邁步離開。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPYmxrCNGI
401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFuenavhF6H
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾，自然而然不會跟上來。401Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBXqEtkxOB
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
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