「去哪？」371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokfgxg2GrG
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMC1xbKpWdB
「急事。」371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdX02hgdrOw
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡajt3npE8gJ
「你不吃晚餐？」371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaGVBQWoNxX
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZWkxgXwFz
我沒應答，逕自出門。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxo4zD34olE
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZhwFtQN5i
冬夜六時。厚衣下的溫暖身軀與袒露的臉和手，不協調感令我忐忑不安。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDio0zh88iF
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLiL9ihKSVO
難以言喻的鬱悶。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2fEZHqM8Br
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1YYXZJYyl
長嘆。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcoNO9NfMX
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9zcvJuhEE
「紅萬。」我邊說邊掏出八達通。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVeTEsV9VVs
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBrTpc7Vsj
店員爽快從身後陳列架取來貨品，熟練在收銀機屏幕上點點按按，然後給我贈品——果汁味肉乾三小包。我有意無意瞄了瞄她的臉。大眾臉，過目即忘。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO82j8tSgt2
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8JqTretosR
「不需要贈品？」她驀地抬眼，與我眼神對上。是發現我的無禮目光嗎？371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHr48fwq7eY
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCDuRilpvF
「我……錯認是口香糖。」我慌忙編個爛藉口，連忙接過香菸和肉乾。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mX1HKC4Ob
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WaqsGQrPT
她假笑，沒再搭理我，拿起抹布四處抹。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCOulZk8Ag
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJUyb9lJvX
我走出光線充足的便利店，重踏漆黑夜空下的大街。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOc06SGPi5
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43EZRt7EwC
另一種不協調。另一種忐忑，另一種不安。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgrTQjRjKmJ
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVmArnU4MrX
櫥窗五光十色，路人絡繹不絕。人潮亂中有序，不約而同在紅色燈號前止住，然後在綠色燈號亮起當刻同時邁步。一致得神奇，一致得可怕。並肩而行的男男女女在過路以後分道揚鑣，不為曾經的遇見生起任何印象或猶豫。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwar8mGPuq
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwcmN1ejGl
心血來潮，我莫名其妙拐到小巷去。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNLAvQ3Qyx
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkqGLAgUAIj
污水，雜物，廚餘，鼠餌，坑渠。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNbm8dHW1fd
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdYJE7NjDPs
髒，亂，腐，毒，臭。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0Ps5MT5ow
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTUF6nlc2v
為何要到這種地方來？不是捷徑，不知盡頭何處，不懷目的……371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1wV2geLg0
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc6tdjg0pSD
小巷盡處是另一小巷，盡頭以後是另一開始。路接路，走又走。不停前行，像是正在找出口；絕不回頭，像是不打算找到真正出口。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡte0pX78lGK
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxafQoGxr5
厭煩日常走過的路，不欲重覆。若問想要到甚麼地方去，其實我沒有答案。很奇妙。眼下似乎有很多選擇，實質一切已成定局。那是大街，這是小巷。大街在明，小巷在暗。大街繁華，小巷冷清。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLw3SDQIHD
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1D0rWHZQ1d
註定的。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJY1u90KODx
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeGGEfrpBt
冷清小巷盡頭會有好東西麼？我不相信，亦不願輕言不相信。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJLIWaDmoO
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsIG2988uW0
汪——汪——嗚——拐角傳來狗隻悲鳴。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphyC3HZp9N
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgsFNhqPic7
停步。猶疑。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67vEqFWqK3
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZAcT4od7GD
惻隱？慈悲？然後呢？根本沒有然後，因為我自顧不暇。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZp63D1HwJ6
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6E8yNR1CKF
轉身。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ673ix1AfoW
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdAGdgSIun3
汪——汪——嗚——拐角狗隻再次悲鳴。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAsRWfbhOY4
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJTKTTGEYCv
我回身走去。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkpPynJwcUc
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwl9pcfd3e
惻隱？慈悲？不，好奇罷。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51XqLRqVQt
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmudBvJQW37
把小狗抱入懷內。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfw4B1sGFrW
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqg2frNJJtK
「暖和沒？」我傻傻自語——嘴巴極需要說話理由。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPA6Igd9MD
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXR8qEA1x2J
陣風從後疾過，寒意夾雜水氣與鹹香。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQBT6PkN0q
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0Ymmelpqg
海風？海濱公園步道？371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5MvDSdLpL
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqLDdpM6bGd
「一起散步去吧。」我沒期望小狗會回答，但我需要溜達原因。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTydttgJ7I
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpxAnexftZ
多拐兩個彎，我帶著小狗在兩幢高樓之間走出來，恰巧看見銀月自海平面升起。清澄，純淨，圓滿。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3s8HdygeE
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOe3G75wAO5
「看！這是月亮。」我指天示意小狗往上望去。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZc9FPfaNSD
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomc4B6BkNr
汪——牠回答，但沒有依指示抬頭。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPo0TfZVKuA
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡochdMsQZ6E
「找個好地方坐坐吧！」為免小狗中途跑掉，我微微拉下外套拉鏈，把小狗往內塞。牠沒反抗，甚至懂得稍為伸出頭部，方便呼吸和看風景。我真慶幸剛才沒有對牠視若無睹：「乖。」371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNimrzyzMh
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0nQHgF6H1
銀月清冷，步道冷清，寧靜。心跳規律，呼吸有序，乏味。回憶很多，未知更多，迷惘。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡek2V5FutSQ
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJeyDnHEbOs
「我上一次來海濱公園是小學畢業後的那個暑假。與幾個特別要好的男生相約到來踩roller，跌了幾跤，膝蓋流血。明明怕血，明明怕痛，偏偏為保面子而強說無事，硬撐一整天。結果翌日膝蓋腫黑大片，痛得要命，不得不到醫院求醫。結果在醫院留醫足足兩個月，九月中才可到新學校上課。」我在路邊長椅坐下，拆開一包贈品肉乾給小狗充飢，報答牠聽我發牢騷。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyWFjXmpse
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaWwVKFcoG2
「留醫期間，我生氣朋友們不來探望我，打算出院後臭罵他們一頓。出院後，我忙於學校課業，忘記致電他們，然後順理成章忘記他們。當我再次想起他們，已是高中畢業的事。」我點菸，一吸一呼，虛假短暫的舒爽。「其實沒甚麼大不了，無需要記在腦袋裡。但事情就是發生過，不是說忘記就可以忘記。」371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTyshq92tt
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUrXrpTUdUI
記憶零碎，思路紊亂。嘴巴想要表達更多，無奈腦袋運轉不來，沒能將感受化為言語……算了吧。反正小狗根本沒興趣聽下去。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc6pOLGEMcK
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0p2iFAiKea
「你似乎對肉乾比較有興趣。」我又拆開一包肉乾予牠。牠吃得津津有味，舌頭不時舔舔嘴邊，甚至舔到小小鼻頭。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ33t2QSVDGU
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6S6pR9zjbI
我笑，笑牠傻氣可愛。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkvakDfYK5
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43CtwmGfEO
又吸一口虛假短暫的舒爽。又呼一口難以言喻的鬱悶。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6jZT5ML8tg
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnS5o3Bcf4f
鬱悶何來？371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmvMG4OWlR
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg9wp7DgzLL
學業壓力？愛情煩惱？家庭不和？371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqVoXOELO2W
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdyeWx5z48
也許統統都是，也許統統不是。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVlJfa0XkjS
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwDgy6uuG4e
多件零星不順心瑣碎事湊在一起成為一股無法消弭的鬱悶。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6p2uP7YEkJ
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbO8stMhsP
有如一根經過繁複工序生產的香菸。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSGNa3Qywc
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRv5Jsvcmrd
有如一塊由豬肉、糖、鹽、增味劑、醬油、香辛料、護色劑、色素組成的肉乾。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGWSbjq1ha
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5EYELRCcUq
「好吃吧。」我又拆開一包肉乾。趁小狗專心咬嚼，我彈走菸屁股，將牠從懷裡抽出，來個深深擁抱。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpXNl2EBMrG
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tXYZS2QTP
然後呢？根本沒有然後。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQCFPX1sko
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4VLKq8JGae
我輕輕放下小狗，動身邁步離開。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeP6qzPmZY
371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2BlfaZkGo
正如牠知道我身上沒有更多肉乾，自然而然不會跟上來。371Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgWucAeJR2A
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》
ns216.73.216.30da2
然後按「加至主畫面」