WARNINGS - Blood, death, killing, murder(sort of??), mild cursing
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“Alexandria Mitochondria Hale, would you do me the utmost, destructible honor of marrying me?” whispered Judy.
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The bed ruffled and Alexandria mumbled, “Ye, Judy June July Greenwood, let’s marry.”
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Judy silently slipped a finger on Alex’s ring finger.
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“Good night,” Judy whispered and then took out a knife from the drawer. She pulled Alexandria closer and drove the blade into the woman's heart.
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Alexandria’s eyes snapped open, blood trickling down her jaw.
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“What?” Alexandria murmured, her eyes wide.
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“I thought we should have our wedding in hell,” she said, smiling softly at her precious love.
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“Alright, see you there.” Alexandria pressed a bloody kiss on her lips, taking out a gun and placing it on Judy’s head.
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Bang!
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Crimson soaked the soft silk of the bed as the life faded out of the two lovers.
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* * *
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In hell. . . .
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Satan cleared his throat, staring down at the two women on the altar.
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“Do you, Alexandria Mitochondria Hale, take Judy June July Greenwood as your wife?” his gruff voice echoed through the depths of hell.
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“Yes, I do,” Alexandria replied.
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“And do you, Judy June July Greenwood, take Alexandria Mitochon—”
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“Yes,” Judy gritted out, clearly impatient.
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Satan scoffed. Rude. “I now pronounce thee, dead and dead.”
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Alexandria raised an eyebrow.
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“I now pronounce thee, wife and wife,” Satan went again.
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Just as the two women were about to kiss, a demon burst through the door of hell.
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“WAIT! STOP THE WEDDING!” it screeched. “I’M IN LOVE WITH SATAN!”
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Silence filled the burning air for a moment.
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“. . . And you interrupted our wedding, why?” Judy questioned.
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“You love me?” Satan asked, ignoring Judy, his voice filled with shock and joy.
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“Yes!” the thing screeched, it too ignoring Judy. “Will you marry me?”
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Satan grinned stepping down from the altar. “Yes!”
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The two couples ended up having a double wedding. Woohoo.
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Ok so in my defense, I didn't have the time nor the motivation to write this. I was in a major writer's block, brain dead, and dead in the brain. So this became a do-or-die situation and me being me chose do. And then in the process of writing I downed half-a-coke and a small can of sprite and then I realized shit was a go-big-or-go-home and me being myself chose go big.
HAHAHAHAHA BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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~ HALEY BEAR (WINK WONK) UMWAH!! <3
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