I just looked up at my previous work/stories and dude....I feel so embarrassed rn.
The me from 2 year ago was such an open person. I was literally 13 at that time and there I was telling people not to give up on life.
Man why did I seemed like I was about to suicide...
The reason I never deleted any of it is cuz after maybe 5 years or 10, I would surely look back to what I was, how I used to write and how much have I improved.
Now that I think about it, diary could be an option but Being with siblings is like having no privacy.
I don't know what has happened to me, but I started to doubt myself. No matter how much I think about it, I end up comparing myself to people who are better than me.
Sometimes I do wish that I could be the person who is loved by everyone. Who has everyone's attention.
I may be selfish but that's really how I feel.
Honestly I feel overwhelmed easily. Even if it's just a simple happybirthday wish, or if someone tells me they miss me. Every Lil stuff makes me happy.
And if you read those book in which there is that girl who has lots of caring friends and a cool life(yup the mc). I just end up feeling jealous.
So what's my point writing all this at mid night?
Just wanna give my heart a Lil rest. U know, writing it down helps.
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