Spring is the season that brings joy, the season that takes everyone out of the dark cloud that is winter. Winter is officially over and it's March 20, 2021, also known as the season switch. The season when flowers start to grow again and flowers, the season when animals start looking for a mate, the season of joy and laughter, the season of love. Some people like winter. Samantha the young woman who likes to be shut out of the world always enjoys it when the winter season is here. The fact that she's been sucked in can be expressed by the depressive season. That she could withdraw into her world and isolate herself from others. She would much rather live in her fantasy world than have to return to reality. She is now in dreamland or rather a nightmare. 'I'm in a black hole, curled up on the floor with my hands over my eyes. I don't mind the darkness. The voices I hear scare me very much. They tell me I have responsibilities. I don't want them! They say it's time to step out of my darkness and enjoy the light. I can't, I don't know-how. My life is as dark as the hole I'm in right now. How can I step into the light? I have been living in darkness and loneliness for 21 years. What if the light burns me like moths drawn to a flame. The light makes me curious. I remove my hands from my eyes, the light starts to come toward me. I allow it and accept my fate. Once the light hits me it starts to burn my skin like lava thrown over me. I start to scream and cry: stop, stop the fire. The pain gets worse and worse. More hysterically I start to cry and cry out in pain as the light devours me and I see nothing but white."
Samantha wakes up with a start, she is sweaty and trembling. "It's just a nightmare, Samantha, it's just a nightmare. A nightmare like the many you have''. she says in her head. Samantha has had nightmares almost every night since she was little. You'd think she's used to it, but no, it still terrifies her. Samantha her cat Katske jumps on the bed and starts to cuddle her. He always does that when Samantha wakes up from one of her many nightmares. Samantha pushes Katske against her chest and tries to calm down. After a few minutes, she calmed down and stood up. She notices that a bright sunbeam shines out the window. She walks towards the window and sees to her surprise that the sun is shining again. "Looks like Katske is coming to spring, the season I hate and the season you love." She tells Kate. Samantha knows it's weird talking to her cat but she also knows it's no crazier than the family she has. Kate meows back and then walks to his bowls. "You're hungry or not?" she says. Katske starts meowing violently. Samantha gives him his wet food which he gets every morning and evening. Then she picks up her phone and sees that it is 10 a.m. Samantha doesn't worry about the time because it's Saturday, she has nothing else to do anyway. Samantha sits down on one of the armchairs that she has in her bedroom, she thinks back to her nightmare. The darkness she loved so much and the light that banished her. It is no coincidence that she dreams of darkness and light as spring has just begun. Samantha thinks she has had this particular nightmare because spring is here, the season full of headaches. Spring is all stress for Samantha. Mandatory dinners where she has to go, visit, make the whole thing. She could always cancel appointments by blaming the weather. "Sorry I caught a cold because of the weather. Sorry, there's a thunderstorm so I can't meet. Sorry but you know I have a low immune system and you have a cold and I'll get the flu soon." She couldn't use those excuses anymore.
Samantha begins to panic at the idea of having to talk to people and pick up her social life. She is an antisocial person who has difficulty communicating. The more she thinks about the obligations facing her, the more she panics. "Calm down it will be fine, calm down." Samantha calms down a bit and is quickly distracted from her panic attack because she called word. It's her mother Paula. Samantha tries to pull herself together because she doesn't want to bother her mother with her weak panic attacks. She inhales and exhales one more time before she picks up. "hey mom good morning! Good morning Samantha, how are you? Good mom. With you?" Her mother inhales hard. Samantha knows her mother has something to complain about when she breathes hard. "Samantha I didn't sleep a wink." Samantha asks hesitantly why she didn't sleep a wink. '' ooooh it's all Samantha that rotten disease, Kadim, Priya, Nina, and you.'' Samantha does not understand why she is the cause of the fact that her mother does not sleep a wink. She understands that her mother is worried about Kadim and Dana constantly arguing, Nina being ill and Priya constantly dealing with Nina. Samantha quietly asks why she is keeping her mother awake. Yes, there we go she notices her mother's irritation over the phone. "Maybe because you always behave abnormally around this time. Perhaps because you are going to start your internship with your father's friend on Monday. Maybe because you're going to talk that stupid mouth of yours and you can't behave." Samantha thinks before she says something because she doesn't want to argue with her mother so she simply says "It will be an all right mommy ." Her mother returns a short and blunt answer "hope so for you." Samantha decides to keep the conversation short and says ''Mom I have to hang up I still have a lot to do in the house and I have to get some stuff before I start my internship.'' Her mother says goodbye and Samantha hangs up.
Samantha leans her head back on the armchair, her mother just makes sure she has more stress than she already had. Samantha pulls herself together and walks downstairs to the living room. Dana and Kadim are sitting on the couch watching a series. Samantha walks into the living room and says "good morning", Kadim and Dana greet Samantha back. Samantha takes a seat on the couch and tries to strike up a conversation with Kadim and Dana. "What are you going to do today?" she asks, Kadim is irritated by her question. "What do you think, I have to go to Dad, solve his problems as always," Samantha asks hesitantly what he should do. "Seriously Samantha what should I not do. I have to clean up his shed because he's too stingy to hire people. That man doesn't understand what I'm doing for him. If there is something he always comes to me, I'm always stuck with his problems." Samantha doesn't say anything back because she doesn't know how he's going to react, whether he's going to have an outburst or not, and if he's going to have his outburst of anger to react. That's a fifty-fifty chance it's on Dana or Samantha. It is never their father who feels Kadim's anger. If Kadim would take it out on his father, he would be locked out. Samantha and Kadim's father doesn't talk to him and if something happens, Kadim can't knock on his door if something is wrong. Samantha tries to change the subject as always when she notices the tension in the air, but Kadim isn't done talking yet. "I always do everything, not you, not Priya, not Yasin BUT ME!" he says frustrated. Dana tries to calm him down by saying she would help clean up the shed, Samantha also immediately offers help, only that only fuels Kadim's anger more. He looks angrily at Dana and Samantha 'what good is it to you? You are already broken after lifting 1 thing. WHAT DON'T YOU GET!? NOTHING! FUCKING NOTHING! A BUNCH OF SMILING CANCER SHARMUTAS (whore in Arabic) ARE YOU?!'' Samantha is shocked but also angry she does her best not to get angry and to scold back. Dana sees it and makes a sign with her hand that she should take it easy. It was already too late because something in Samantha snapped. She starts screaming back violently. "You word mad at us for nothing! You complain and complain but you choose to say yes! YOU Kadim chooses to do things for him! You choose to run after him like a lap dog, not me!" Samantha storms upstairs, she doesn't want to hear the nonsense that comes out of Kadim's mouth. Kadim yells back but Samantha ignores what he says and heads for her bedroom. She locks her bedroom door so that if things get out of hand, Kadim can't come in. At least as long as he doesn't break the lock. Samantha grabs her headphones so she can listen to music. When she puts her headphones on loud, she doesn't hear Kadim's screams either. She puts on some quiet music, it always cools her anger when she listens to some quiet music. Samantha begins to calm down after a while and falls asleep exhausted.
Samantha is startled awake by something sitting on her lap. It is Katske who jumped on her lap. She strokes his little head. After Katske faints, he jumps off her leg. He walks towards the walk-in closet, and Samantha follows him. Katske stands still in front of the hook where his harness is. Samantha immediately understands what he wants to say "I want to go outside", that means. Samantha thinks a walk would do her good too. She quickly changes, takes off her pajamas, and swaps them for a Nike tech tracksuit. Only shoes on and Katske put on his harness and leash then she is ready to go outside. After Samantha Katske has put on his harness and leash, she walks downstairs. To her surprise, Kadim and Dana are gone, ''probably cleaning up the shed'' she thinks. Samantha takes her keys and walks out. Whenever she walks with Katske, she walks through the forest that is near the house, it is also where she now walks with Katske next to her. Samantha always tries to clear her head during a walk, only she doesn't succeed. Negative memories distract her. The rage that Kadim has, how he takes it out on her. She's so in thought that she doesn't notice what's going on around her. Samantha falls into a rabbit hole and falls face to face. She heard a crack in her foot and extreme pain followed it. Samantha is in such pain that she can cry but she holds back, she is more worried about Katske. Looking up, she sees Katske running away. Samantha tries to get up to go after Katske, but only her foot stops her. When she tries to move it, there is a violent sting. Lying on the floor with tears in her eyes she tries to call Katske "Katske come here, come back!" she yells a few times. No reaction. Samantha finds her phone to call for help. Much to her surprise, her phone fell a few feet away. She looks around her looking for help but sees no one. ''The only way I can ask for help is to call someone, for that I need my phone which is 3 meters away from me. I can't walk either, so I have to crawl." Realizes. Crawling, she tries to grab her phone. "I'm almost there, almost," she says to herself. Samantha stretches out her arm to reach for her phone. Someone is already ahead of her and picks up her phone. Samantha angrily yells ''Give this jerk!'', she looks up and sees to her surprise that a man has Katske in one arm and the phone in his hand.
Who is the man who has Katske and her phone?
Keep following my story and you'll find out! I'm already typing chapter 2, which means you'll find out soon.
I also want to thank the people who have read my prologue.
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