天亮，上班。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIqrqR83Kbe
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1GawAXO8H
擠進人山人海的車廂，心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物，我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟，好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9mqcj6CTaB
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1niNcSRxW
車廂一如往常，平穩中帶輕微搖晃，教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲，繼續進食，令人側目。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1sEQce5Aou
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8QXyyOqGO5
食物的細碎，像沙子一樣，在人們毫不注意的情況下，悄然掉在地上，再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站，人們再肆意加以踐踏，令碎粉再度粉碎。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPg1F0iyFjO
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNLqFC919Kj
到站了，我有意無意地繞過人羣，「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉，心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上，我回頭望進車廂，想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉，但列車經已開駛。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwz1nrGhWtf
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Xln8pspWg
看不見，罷。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmky3zgKZq
天黑，下班。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJdEY3W9Xc
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFRB31aRRd
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂，繼續講上司的壞話。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2QBgU57OI
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRdsgzuOoKi
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9h2B1EHVu
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWnjK3oFEx5
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不！有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰？我看不見……我不想看見……278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFRPgHPSjtm
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbSvfQAAQdL
「啪」的一聲，男同事一手拍在我的小腿上，那隻螞蟻——扁了。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppkbxuXEes
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBtNnpBn2H
「沒事了！」他笑了笑，問我：「你很怕小昆蟲？」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbfrWE2r6U
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxlrF3q3ZRq
「不，只是怕蟻。」我感覺到，我的唇還在顫抖，但卻仍勉力一笑。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRxx3gGBDx
公司，午飯時間。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoc8A9NHYz2
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25v3UZhtya
甲小姐正在上網看劇；乙先生在打盹；丙小姐外出吃飯去；丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒；戊小姐……278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYa46MkVcR
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tI89evpP8
看著同事們的百態，我突然覺得自己和他們一樣，都是很渺小的生命體，小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事，尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌，不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎？那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別？278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJUiQN84WmX
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2itw7JkhCq
驀地，我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過，卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上，讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失，我感到自己也消失了似的。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8X3PnQtW70
其實，真正的我只是一隻螞蟻，不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己變成人類，過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活，是有目的的付出，有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑，多奢侈！無他，這就是意義。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSB3OSWRB5n
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb03EMbk6P2
還是……278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJx8hQe1C1W
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWUOHwlWmJZ
其實，真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己是一隻蟻，過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味，只懂一味尋找食物。無他，這就是生存！278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzNnrPnc4mA
公司，工作。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQP87Nl8hG
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjOQcfZDbzS
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAowQKwCkQR
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQYnMUusd3
大家心知犯錯的不是我，奈何人是怕事的，只好把我推上斷頭台。事後，一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGuzEUjWDbO
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkleVbwFPHD
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6nTnAQmI6
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡed5HFEI02Y
剛巧，一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMgn75s26Xj
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiv7LzEOALQ
快意，笑了。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGY7b64Qna
酒吧，喝酒。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaLCm8i9lC
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXPkhAlCY2
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎？為何現在也怕酒起來？」男同事笑問。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUZSFvsvUMQ
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxLpW8s0kwc
「其實，我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGxyVtrxb7W
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwHtDDD6Lg
「還是……你根本不會喝酒？」他哈哈大笑。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjlFVw8s0pq
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpZzyLSS66
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲，我突然變得不大抗拒，乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZEoKluFJB
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjAnglva5ss
醉倒。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqrCuoDSszy
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9TSpyJJjdx
迷糊間，我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體，不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲，想要到它的洞穴去……278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzWDzV80SY
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5kTZ9IOwPJ
「上天取走你的一扇門，定會留給你一扇窗。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6K0dJEEMDL
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMRNjXdISu
今趟，上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0PUacKbDQ8
假期，醫院。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcg0YFmjnl
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGitmrI8VY
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病，還未明確，因為報告要待下星期才會完成。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU1QVyVOc4e
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxlIUcIa2Vd
看見媽的時候，家中各人都是淚眼漣漣，很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNzT7tKUcG
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIskXWFXoy3
「我覺得……」近幾天，媽的話都變得斷斷續續：「自己……」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRFvyS1Eere
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOEGsfwaNt3
大家都屏息靜氣，深怕這是她的最後一句話。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOkLqUyWqE
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1EnqNpJdVu
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音，輕如柔絲，但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIS1Mnc0B7
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh27463uCJl
死寂。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrfefyYcjL
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQeYXCLY1zf
出乎我意料，這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話，不論是肉體還是心靈上。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5OhlZbJKO
回家，晚飯。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCuaNa92qmT
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsftiMO1ta
一枱六椅，異常的沉默。電視的聲浪，掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意，繼續吃。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRDhNadpYnM
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5txyQLuoD
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子：「不如外出吃飯。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdORwJZ2KEf
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9rhSLgQlh
妹放下筷子衝進房內，甩門；姨低下頭來，但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見；婆呆了，眼眶紅潤；我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8A1s5W5ZV
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFnofADR2w
我心想：世界末日來臨後，地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻？278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqsZwOXNgx
每次望著媽，心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣，彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjjuM2rsaa
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5RJDOOGCY
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑！就是因為她是一隻螞蟻，所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭，去減輕她的負擔。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5S5b4f7DK
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5fKEjZMyN
久而久之，我每次一見到她，便會掉頭走。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVUrH7Cdzwe
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCprCFLhP07
但我知道，我永沒能走遠。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9J7T4dMBh
男友家，床上。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDWxGpaXMf4
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7YT3WBrG6
前奏後，男友進入極度興奮狀態，沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時，我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtX7IKnItTy
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqSUohAhis5
産房內有一張床，床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了，是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示，她要生産了。不消一會，整張床上都是幼蟻，恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHkxnIDCCR
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqj9rUMYGH4
我驚恐萬分之際，耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音：「他朝君體也相同！」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIYQGrABWA3
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmKiXevGpI
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮，於是更用力……278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9MUDEnq7ln
舊生聚會，內地某酒家。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡacaIYA9laH
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoP07gmoGpI
說也奇怪，舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意，說會給我們驚喜。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6MerQRwaZ
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjkoEs9HZh
「蟻宴？」我呆了，但逃不了。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW9ao4qR8JF
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BRM5WjEZZ
「你有收看《天與地》嗎？」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR2Ex4R3joL
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6hNxW3KHEo
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼！」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gMBEdLSIE
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEmSqX6Xdz0
「結局何如？」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSrDA9kgXd
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbKzsbsuRx
「沒好下場！」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrUrEeVwYb
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZKvqj4dlA
「對！沒好下場！」我在心裡重覆著，衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5bJqe3wV3
男友有很多恐怖的寵物：蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時，他都會放一些寵物在床邊，以增加他的性趣。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6lGnfpDPPo
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5no10yqmTF
今趟，床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後，我不經意的問道：「你的寵物呢？」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZrKBCxDUr
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeGaobjYPp
「在你體內。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsr1wdRPttE
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTodGc6jyh
「甚麼？」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ2ZIFlBS6h
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfv9P6wYSpF
「蟻。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1IXt7imKfV
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLg2tH8bx4
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD7XOBFn4v9
它平常會做甚麼？做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯，它會做的事真的很多，但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活！它最好立刻消失！278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNTlpUXRO04
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcR4IjKRLgO
結果，我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYybhpwwmC
靈堂上，我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡacqZXtPe0i
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHSpvfiBEA
「她真的死了嗎？」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊，但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6484ROjkQa
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RawUdLZHN
「誰？」另一聲音反問。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgiugXo1tBV
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZirniM5zpT
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道：「她……」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdmR9NSK7ZG
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkf2kdaE4K
靜。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrJMLpuN0A
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQo40QQpPdr
我回過神來，低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCGvIFfV2Z
我：「我的耳朵有毛病嗎？為何會聽到螞蟻講話？」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qvZXLIYzR
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhVWWkDlg3Z
醫：「不。是你的壓力過大，導致有幻聽。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBd7V7zoqTg
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAAd79SC5b
我：「我有精神病？」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyPeXQrpqPA
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyGZyr0SpGn
醫：「是情緒病。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1w0374ljNt
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlgUx1Nq8w
我：「怎麼辦？」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpDe28Xvq6
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyaLfe74ZnL
醫：「我會處方一些藥物，你要按時服用；另外，你也要多休息……」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWrZ0iKfiaJ
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgJyAc9brph
我：「謝謝醫生。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTbhkWAzXa
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ88PD1KIcOi
醫：「不用謝。」278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpvOxjmzjnx
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQGPGZfevYD
離開診所時，我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYkcLmnJ9O
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGalbzaZRID
不，我走近細看，是「虫馬虫義」專科。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdtxnEpAN0
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻？278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ua2fKErkh
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27JjKp4q0n
醫生替我作身體檢查，一切正常；278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRZBvM17Xv
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡenUjvZ6hUN
男友向我解釋，螞蟻之說，純粹幽默；278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxWRTFNiTP
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzfKlp4DPo
同事都勸我休息，減少工作量；278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkLKA1IE5F
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPrnHmnHIi
……278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgKcIBI6DB
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUscmRiACPx
「真的有蟻在我體內！」我尖叫，奪門而出，從天台一躍而下，肝腦塗地。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMre3qnwIwf
278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsDtufRUcFS
臨死前，我看見那東西了——不是蟻，是……
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規，煩請創挑主通知，願刪文。278Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2NYlFMexL3
然後按「加至主畫面」