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求評
JIN
#1
https://www.penana.com/story/148940/%E5%A4%A9%E4%BD%BF%E8%88%87%E6%83%A1%E9%AD%94
第一次嘗試公開寫小說,覺得自己怕是有很多需要改善的地方但不知從何改起,需要有人點評一下、勞煩各位大大了
2 months ago
Reply
星雨夜
#2
以下是個人「極」不專業的觀點,有令您生氣千萬別打我哈!
故事性結構來說,目前幾篇敘述的很簡單扼要,有些內心細節描述得很好,個人認為沒什麼硬傷呢,繼續寫下去吧!如果真有內文邏輯結構再來改就行啦!
至於文字符號,或許當時改到臉黑留下的創傷,變成大長篇後開始習慣注意。刪節號是六個點;破折號兩個,都是全形符號。另外每段落最好習慣縮行哦。
最後大概就是網路用語和正式文章用語的差別吧!不外乎就是問號和驚嘆號的合併使用,以前我也常常犯這種「問題」。
之所以不用「錯誤」是因為在其他正式文學中「?」、「!」不會同時並存使用,或者多個問號連續使用以表達非常之錯愕。
但在網路文學中不乏把慣用的習性帶入。當然信者恆信,或許很久以後這些就變成了約定俗成了。
總之,大概就是小問題,不影響故事內容的精彩性。目前才剛開始,期待後續的發展哦~啾咪~
2 months ago
Reply
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第一次嘗試公開寫小說,覺得自己怕是有很多需要改善的地方但不知從何改起,需要有人點評一下、勞煩各位大大了
故事性結構來說,目前幾篇敘述的很簡單扼要,有些內心細節描述得很好,個人認為沒什麼硬傷呢,繼續寫下去吧!如果真有內文邏輯結構再來改就行啦!
至於文字符號,或許當時改到臉黑留下的創傷,變成大長篇後開始習慣注意。刪節號是六個點;破折號兩個,都是全形符號。另外每段落最好習慣縮行哦。
最後大概就是網路用語和正式文章用語的差別吧!不外乎就是問號和驚嘆號的合併使用,以前我也常常犯這種「問題」。
之所以不用「錯誤」是因為在其他正式文學中「?」、「!」不會同時並存使用,或者多個問號連續使用以表達非常之錯愕。
但在網路文學中不乏把慣用的習性帶入。當然信者恆信,或許很久以後這些就變成了約定俗成了。
總之,大概就是小問題,不影響故事內容的精彩性。目前才剛開始,期待後續的發展哦~啾咪~