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寫作交流討論 | Penana
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有沒有出現過一直覺得自己寫的渣,不敢上載的情況?
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艾雅
#13
嗯……我大概看了兩話,坦白說,我覺得你可能需要調整一下丟出世界觀設定的節奏,一次丟太多了,其實我完全記不住你寫的世界觀,建議在這上面放慢步調,優先以能讓讀者理解整個作品的世界觀為主。你在某些部分時,幾乎無分段,導致我看兩三行就不行了(當然也可能跟我沒耐心有關,可是看到十幾行字擠在一起不想跳過也很難……),這在網路連載來說,過長的段落反而是不好,五、六行就是一段落的最大極限了。
還有就是關於人稱用字遣詞上的問題,要注意第一人稱應該更著重在角色的內心,不是說不要敘述角色的動作,是你的第一人稱寫得太像第三人稱了,只差稱呼是我而不是角色名字而已
這只是我的淺見而已,看看就好。
3 years ago
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還有就是關於人稱用字遣詞上的問題,要注意第一人稱應該更著重在角色的內心,不是說不要敘述角色的動作,是你的第一人稱寫得太像第三人稱了,只差稱呼是我而不是角色名字而已
這只是我的淺見而已,看看就好。