the flow is really improving, though some of the grammatical and punctuation errors are a bit of an eye sore, the characters are becoming more developed as we get to see more of there true potential. I will be honest, I was a little uncertain about this story in the begining, but I saw potential, so had to stick to it.
Good story as it mostly has a nice flow to it. However, there are some slight mistakes on the punctuations and grammatical errors that sometimes can be a bore but with some fixing it would make the story more better. Also, when one of the characters argues about something, try to make Jefferson to argue with them a little bit before agreeing to whatever they are saying - it balances the conversation and flow of the story. Besides that, it's a good one - which I've said that before lol Keep it up! :)
Thanks for the critic, as always. As for Jefferson, that is just his character. Think of him as someone who succumbs easily to people's requests (if their requests are physically possible for him) but there's still room for development though. so I hope you'll look forward for the upcoming chapters.
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Keep it up! :)