Comments - Dear Daisy: Highschool Years

Search stories, writers or societies

Show More Tags

Continue ReadingClear All

What Others Are ReadingRefresh

See more results for ""

Never miss what's happening on Penana!

Turn on notifications

Later

RozzyAuthor

Maybe this kid is actually okay? I really hope so

3 years agoReply

Mira

Yeah!!! We hope so!

3 years agoReply

MarkTwain2.0

YES!!! NOT-QUITE-SO-SAD KAI!!!!

3 years agoReply

Esfandiar C. Hale

wtf

3 years agoReply

Mira

YEAHHH!

3 years agoReply

One thing to note --- repetition. To be fair, journal entries aren't the most properly written, though there are some moments where it says, "beside me" too much (perhaps shorten it to "I felt someone beside me, and when I looked over, there was Daffodil" -- something in that vein). Or the word "usual," which is used a bit too closely in the same paragraph (perhaps instead of 'as usual' you can say 'as always' just to switch up the word choice.)

A long-term tip -- read over the letters and just see if there are any words that repeat too much. If so, find some synonyms as replacement. :)

3 years agoReply

Mira

Oh okay! I normally don't do a bunch of proofreading but thank you! Repetition seems to be an issue with some of these. Thank you though! I will look out for it! I think I've sort of fixed it for this issue

3 years agoReply

@Mira, welcome! I think the chapter sounds better now :D

3 years agoReply

Mira

@Cheeto oh my gosh how the heck are you so quick?

3 years agoReply

I was on here while half-occupied with a blog post, and therefore I just got the notif for this XD

3 years agoReply

Back to Story

Reading Theme:

Line Spacing:

Paragraph Spacing:

Load the next issue automatically

Reset to default

× People Who Like This

Reading Theme:

Font Size:

Line Spacing:

Paragraph Spacing:

Load the next issue automatically