A really intriguing start! The pacing is very well done, it rarely feels too slow or too fast, but the flashbacks can get a little tiresome; each one adds little to the mythology of the hotel and adds backstory to characters that we don't particularly care for, such as Guillermo.There are a few spelling and grammar errors, most probably due to a typo - it's not a big issue but it distracts the reader from the great atmosphere you're building up.My biggest quibble would be that some sentences feel a bit awkward or vapid; for example, Amelia's death is recounted using the sentence '...when she was killed by hundreds of crows under suspicious circumstances', or something to that effect. This sentence pokes out a bit due to the fact that the reader gets that it's suspicious, and the 'under suspicious circumstances' feels pointless and forced. Sentences like this don't crop up often here, but when they do it breaks the flow a little bit. You've built up a great atmosphere here, with well thought-out pacing - the characters are a bit bland right now but the plot moves them along well. All in all, these a really good opening chapters! :)
You've built up a great atmosphere here, with well thought-out pacing - the characters are a bit bland right now but the plot moves them along well. All in all, these a really good opening chapters! :)