Really well written stressful dying scene especially for so early in the book, yes i know i kill characters early too, it’s not a bad thing if you do it well which you did.
Wow! You are really good at adding twists and turns to a story. I also like how the characters express their emotions. It all seems vividly real and it strikes something in someone who is reading.
Cameo is going through a lot of emotional turmoil. Actually they all are going through a lot. The way the story is unfolding is amazing absolutely love it.
Well... That escalated fast. Another fun chapter, M. I've been enjoying the story.
However, I do want bring up one point. In the beginning of the chapter when you describe Cameo's backstory, I do feel like you may have missed an opportunity. Instead of revealing the backstory in a single paragraph of exposition, I believe you could have created a more impactful moment by layering it in dialogue over time. You could have created small setups, deserving payoffs, that could have been sprinkled throughout the story, revealing his motivation for wanting to do what he wants to do, but not all at once.
Granted, I mention this more for future consideration considering you're already on chapter 37.
Other than that, though, I really enjoyed the chapter. The action was good and nicely timed. The romance was cute and slightly humorous, and it was just a fun read. Onto the next one! :)
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but also I love the names
But I'm so glad you like the names!
Cameo is going through a lot of emotional turmoil. Actually they all are going through a lot. The way the story is unfolding is amazing absolutely love it.
However, I do want bring up one point. In the beginning of the chapter when you describe Cameo's backstory, I do feel like you may have missed an opportunity. Instead of revealing the backstory in a single paragraph of exposition, I believe you could have created a more impactful moment by layering it in dialogue over time. You could have created small setups, deserving payoffs, that could have been sprinkled throughout the story, revealing his motivation for wanting to do what he wants to do, but not all at once.
Granted, I mention this more for future consideration considering you're already on chapter 37.
Other than that, though, I really enjoyed the chapter. The action was good and nicely timed. The romance was cute and slightly humorous, and it was just a fun read. Onto the next one! :)