/comment.php?chapter=2&id=192200
Comments - 霧里看花 | Penana
arrow_back
Comments - 霧里看花
info_outline
format_color_text
toc
comment 0
exposure_plus_1
Search stories, writers or societies
Show More Tags
Continue ReadingClear All
More
What Others Are ReadingRefresh
See more results for ""
X
Never miss what's happening on Penana!
Turn on notifications
Later
Login with Facebook or Sign up/Login to leave a comment.
燈凜
白衣少女的真實身分是誰呢？這的確是個很吊胃口的地方。

小建議：敘事視角統一會比較好，這章一開始用「我」（第一人稱視角），後來又變成里花（第三人稱視角），我一開始看這章有點搞混了
8 months agoReply
南嶺笑笑生
感謝你的建議，小的已記下了，看什麼時候再審視全文並統一修改。
8 months agoReply
楠都月
括號了的對白是誰說的（？） 作者傾向每章都比較短呢。 真的有點霧里看花的迷惑氣氛了（X
8 months agoReply
南嶺笑笑生
括號的對白是里花的心裡話。至於每章的篇幅嘛……是因爲小的文學根底不足，寫不出長文。
8 months agoReply
Back to Story
×
×
Write down what you like about the story
×
Reading Theme:

Font Size:

Line Spacing:

Paragraph Spacing:

Load the next issue automatically


Reset to default

X
×
x
Proceed

x
Before You Publish
Please ensure your story does not contain illegal, hateful, inciting, or violence-promoting content, or any infringing, plagiarized, or spam material, and that it complies with Penana’s Terms of Use.
Penana reserves the right to remove any content that violates these rules or causes legal or community risk, and to suspend or terminate related accounts.
arrow_back
×

Select a reason:

×

Install this webapp for easier offline reading: tap and then Add to home screen.