I enjoyed reading this, however I have noticed the misuse of comma's and grammar in some areas so I would go through it again and see where they need to be placed. Either than that, it's informative and I like how you wrote Embers reaction to her father being shot in front of her. Very realistic

Your storyline clear and there is some suspense in it. It's informative to learn the doudle standards of the crime punishments for male and female. The only thing I spotted is that you tend to describe multiple happenings in a long sentence. Maybe you can break it down and make each sentence more specific. Nice start!