Comments - A Lion's Cub & A Lion's Heart

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Marygrace

Anne kneels at the execution block, blindfold over her eyes, skirts neatly arranged, waiting for the blade. Suddenly, a messenger rushes up the scaffold, parchment in hand, halting the execution as the crowd gasps in shock.

8 months agoReply

Zpenut

Brilliant! You have personified Anne perfectly, something that is hard to do in a historical setting (at least I think so). I really am excited to read more, and I am not much of a history person so I hope that shows just how thrilling this story is.

9 years agoReply

Sarah Louise

@Zpenut Thank you! I find lots of people tend to either think she was a total saint or a total villain and I'm hoping to place her somewhere in between. I hope you'll carry on reading, and if you want any more info on historical context I'm more than happy to oblige.

9 years agoReply

Nocturne

I got shivers from that ending! I wonder if Elizabeth would've been queen if Anne had been exiled instead. I guess I'll just have to keep reading!

One criticism I'd like to point out though is that you suddenly switch to Cromwell's POV at some point in the chapter. I think it's better to stay in one POV so that it won't be confusing for readers. If you REALLY do need to switch POV's, it's good to indicate it with a break.

But other than that, amazing work! I always have trouble with historical fiction but I can easily tell you're such a natural at it! Fantastic job!!!

9 years agoReply

Sarah Louise

Thank you! I have a habit of slipping into different POV's and I never quite know when I'm doing it... it just sort of happens. I will try and either cut down on it or make it more obvious that it's changed POV! Thanks!

9 years agoReply

Nocturne

@Sarah Louise, no problem, glad to help!

9 years agoReply

Mathew Babaoye

Some of my favorite writing on Penana here. Great stuff.

9 years agoReply

Sarah Louise

Why thank you! :)

9 years agoReply

Luddite

Oh wow, this is exciting! I love this era in history. I can't wait to read more!

Quick question, were her co-defendants executed? Or will that be addressed in later chapters (perhaps I need to read ahead before posting, but I'm so intrigued!)

10 years agoReply

Sarah Louise

Thank you!! & yes to both! It is mentioned in later chapters and yes the other men were executed :)

10 years agoReply

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