I love the intro and the plot line of the story thus far, and anything Manga/Japanese is what I love to read the most. I believe it is her Mother that messaged Yona, being that Yona has been wanting to meet her but her Father dismisses her requests especially when you think about it...Yona has done everything in her will to obey her Father's expectations. The least he could do is grant her that wish. But maybe due to past resentment, pride, or even just plain arrogance, he doesn't do so. I'm interested in reading more. xoxo
oh thank you too much. Well I'll publish further after two days but if you want to read still then check out this Novel in Wattpad My Musical Heights. you'll find it there
I will admit that this isn't normally a type of story that I would generally read, but I can see where a plot like this could be very interesting to someone else. It has a clear direction with plenty of potential conflict that can drive it forward. There's a lot here that can be relatable to many readers. Wanting to do something with your life, but being blocked by the wishes of family. Sadly, this is a common issue that a lot of people go through. If done correctly, I can see this story doing really well. However, with that being said, there are areas that need to be addressed.
This time, I checked your profile and noticed you put that you're from Pakistan. Seeing that, I'm assuming that English is probably not your first language. I want to apologize for not noticing that when I reviewed your other story. Regardless, if you really want to get a good readership, you will need to work on your grammar. If I'm right about English not being your first language, then I can understand that this will be a rather challenging obstacle. There are options, though. As I mentioned in my review of your other story, programs like Grammarly and Pro-Writing Aid (if they are available to you) are extremely helpful tools in catching spelling and grammatical errors. Another option you have is collaborating with someone who can offer to proofread your work. I would offer myself, but I wouldn't be very reliable due to my busy life schedule.
Overall, I think you have a pretty solid idea here with this story. If you can work on improving your grammar skills, then I really think you might have something here. It has the potential to be ripe with drama and end in a wholesome manner. I feel like that could resonate with a lot of people. Keep it up, and good luck to you. :)
It is for the first time in my life that a person gave me such helpful Advice. Thank you Mr. Jay. I don't have words for thanking you but really , you have guided me right and great. Next time I'll follow your advice
@Jennie [ A.N ], You're welcome. Glad I could help. I won't lie, I get frustrated with bare minimum feedback, so when I comment on someone else's stuff, I try my best to write something substantial that can actually be useful to the author.
This time, I checked your profile and noticed you put that you're from Pakistan. Seeing that, I'm assuming that English is probably not your first language. I want to apologize for not noticing that when I reviewed your other story. Regardless, if you really want to get a good readership, you will need to work on your grammar. If I'm right about English not being your first language, then I can understand that this will be a rather challenging obstacle. There are options, though. As I mentioned in my review of your other story, programs like Grammarly and Pro-Writing Aid (if they are available to you) are extremely helpful tools in catching spelling and grammatical errors. Another option you have is collaborating with someone who can offer to proofread your work. I would offer myself, but I wouldn't be very reliable due to my busy life schedule.
Overall, I think you have a pretty solid idea here with this story. If you can work on improving your grammar skills, then I really think you might have something here. It has the potential to be ripe with drama and end in a wholesome manner. I feel like that could resonate with a lot of people. Keep it up, and good luck to you. :)