你好,我是莊坌但。627Please respect copyright.PENANA41XcaJ2m6l
627Please respect copyright.PENANACJxlADBeU9
等等,你現在一定「噗嗤」的笑了出來,然後想著這是什麼白痴名字啊?627Please respect copyright.PENANA4LIo1wMwVB
627Please respect copyright.PENANAaKTx3uR9GO
對,我也覺得這名字很白痴,尤其這還是我爸整整一年叫我兒子,終於在我一歲整時,去找個算命師特別算出來的名字,據說是九五之尊的好名字。627Please respect copyright.PENANAXv2StK8eoI
627Please respect copyright.PENANAQdMCJCadxf
我覺得這應該是九五加滿的屁名字,九五個屁。627Please respect copyright.PENANA7gmLQOrdjM
627Please respect copyright.PENANAsJPMmSYsAB
再說說當我爸第二天再帶我去找那個算命師時,那個算命師竟然被警察抄掉了。627Please respect copyright.PENANAiSPB6t48Mf
627Please respect copyright.PENANAOA71gsSE6Y
媽的,在我面前被抄掉耶。627Please respect copyright.PENANAwV0B7PAbQ0
627Please respect copyright.PENANAt1hFCLu5t0
我想這件事絕對對我造成很大的創傷,不然我也不會把一歲發生的事記到現在了。627Please respect copyright.PENANATzybax8GO1
627Please respect copyright.PENANA6imKdezPt7
更別說每次的自我介紹了,那簡直是地獄。627Please respect copyright.PENANA8JhGKEQI1S
627Please respect copyright.PENANA0y4pKRgAAQ
「大家好,我叫……黑板上的就是我的名字。」我總是低著頭,不想看到班上同學討論我名字的嘴臉,那會讓我不小心上社會新聞頭版。627Please respect copyright.PENANABOhyO6uiHU
627Please respect copyright.PENANA98pBaLs92J
小學一年級,同學看不懂我的名字,還有種「你好屌喔」的感覺。627Please respect copyright.PENANAgztUEZw6Lu
627Please respect copyright.PENANA2Kb4NoY5xR
到了小學六年級,那真的很恐怖。627Please respect copyright.PENANApzVdLofq4H
627Please respect copyright.PENANA7CkRsg8OD6
「喂,那叫莊什麼但?」一個看起來長大會拿刀跟別人問好的同學,轉頭問一個年紀輕輕就戴了看起來和戴起來度數都超深的眼鏡的同學。627Please respect copyright.PENANAXYTYMch7hx
627Please respect copyright.PENANAwKALvAnN8g
「坌,念起來就跟笨蛋的笨一樣。」戴眼鏡的同學想都沒想就講出來。627Please respect copyright.PENANAEom83VunDL
627Please respect copyright.PENANA6UmsdCUHK8
全班開始爆笑,我只能站在台上傻笑,一直笑,不然我會想掐死那個戴眼鏡的同學。627Please respect copyright.PENANAhlkKwis5rv
627Please respect copyright.PENANAXltkkgKOYL
請把這個畫面重播,這也是我國高中自我介紹時,所發生的慘劇。627Please respect copyright.PENANAykQkJ3phFc
627Please respect copyright.PENANAzehgAlRhs2
而我的綽號,也一路走來,始終如一的「笨蛋」加上一個會心一笑。627Please respect copyright.PENANAO4kA87F0qI
627Please respect copyright.PENANAdjIRwCOAlZ
大學聯誼時,我想我就像是在地獄被天使笑吧。627Please respect copyright.PENANAgnUcS0v7vI
627Please respect copyright.PENANAeArjeqx5S3
「你好,我是……」627Please respect copyright.PENANAtGRUpB1HmZ
627Please respect copyright.PENANASQXsPIDy94
「他的名字叫莊坌但喔!超厲害的對不對?坌就是大坌坑文化那個坌,但就是但是的那個但,所以我們都叫他笨蛋喔,超屌的對不對?」627Please respect copyright.PENANAeyeMHFNj6i
627Please respect copyright.PENANA74QPwEksXz
室友真是幫我介紹的相當好……個屁!627Please respect copyright.PENANASwKrANp8Af
627Please respect copyright.PENANAIH42pR4MmW
我就只能傻愣愣的笑,然後對面女生就摀著嘴笑。627Please respect copyright.PENANAIdrjcmMkS0
627Please respect copyright.PENANAjVpAED5Haa
偏偏,我的長相比普通還普通,也沒有有錢的老爸,更沒有找男人屁眼的癖好,所以我一直沒有女朋友。627Please respect copyright.PENANAV8n5CmmJqp
627Please respect copyright.PENANAPiuGE43rsd
畢竟,誰也不想叫「笨蛋的女朋友」吧?627Please respect copyright.PENANAnzUfyQc2VE
627Please respect copyright.PENANATIeRyiaxH8
再說說我的人生吧,這名字絕對是個詛咒!627Please respect copyright.PENANAPPswvyyfIA
627Please respect copyright.PENANAUf7lolbXEM
從小體適能1600跑走就是我的惡夢,更別說在那段期間我身體的抵抗力還會自動升級一個level!627Please respect copyright.PENANAn3jjHHNKLQ
627Please respect copyright.PENANAJHO8rikI7R
此時你一定會想,抵抗力提升有啥不好?627Please respect copyright.PENANArdRFnsC117
627Please respect copyright.PENANAvBl9DG0sGd
不好啊非常的不好啊!627Please respect copyright.PENANAgOslfNwnju
627Please respect copyright.PENANATsRenDyU8O
感冒簡直跟我是好碰友,我家擺的藥也簡直可以開一間藥局了。627Please respect copyright.PENANAm1D15qdXEH
627Please respect copyright.PENANAOU5VCQ0TCN
而體育老師的規定,只要身體不舒服就可以不用參加,前提是,他會陪著你去保健室。627Please respect copyright.PENANA8cnC5vPO6K
627Please respect copyright.PENANAP593AoDjDN
但是,就算測體適能前一天,我的鼻子還在被鼻涕強姦,只要一覺醒來,我就能夠用鼻子呼吸,然後痰也會自動消失,肚子痛什麼的也一併痊癒!627Please respect copyright.PENANAfvD4l2wnds
627Please respect copyright.PENANAhMF5pOCVN9
然後我當然只能哀怨的等著老師點到我的名字,接著緩緩的跑完1600……或是走完。627Please respect copyright.PENANA5PMmq1rkQ9
627Please respect copyright.PENANASCpLRogL5q
出了社會,總是得找份工作。627Please respect copyright.PENANAjZwU06Oc7U
627Please respect copyright.PENANAFwFASqRlPn
我自己買了台50CC通勤。627Please respect copyright.PENANAwU91LBA5p9
627Please respect copyright.PENANACZt6zhs1O0
但我想它跟我一樣,體弱多病。627Please respect copyright.PENANABCqLjFULhw
627Please respect copyright.PENANAli4zaWegpD
常常停個紅燈後,它就不想動了,所以我得一個月去車行一次,不然我就只能走路去上班。627Please respect copyright.PENANAvZSj4YxYQ2
627Please respect copyright.PENANAgLqyuB3Apk
而且我想,它是台只要載別人就會很威猛的50CC。627Please respect copyright.PENANAPvj41M5pjR
627Please respect copyright.PENANAsOwzNNu656
「坌但我今天坐公車來,等等載我回家喔。」627Please respect copyright.PENANAoUkrl06tfS
627Please respect copyright.PENANATBNCZNkwmF
「喔,不過我的50CC很爛,有可能一半就掛了喔。」627Please respect copyright.PENANAGbA5ylClEU
627Please respect copyright.PENANAr53M6J4sPK
「哎呀,沒差啦,真的掛了再說。」627Please respect copyright.PENANANx8hC1BFQ3
627Please respect copyright.PENANAsDYRXzw0vF
然後,我很順利的將同事載回去,而我家的50CC在路上連熄火都沒有。627Please respect copyright.PENANAHDuTPiHG66
627Please respect copyright.PENANAYQhH57S8f7
「沒很爛啊,聽它引擎的聲音感覺很猛咧。」同事在他家門前這樣說。627Please respect copyright.PENANAvRziPSETtz
627Please respect copyright.PENANA8XWEt0u9qW
我發動50CC,然後同事關門。627Please respect copyright.PENANATbuBlyrY6R
627Please respect copyright.PENANAsSExaMFasj
它熄火,我傻眼。627Please respect copyright.PENANAsK7Ube0iXy
627Please respect copyright.PENANAEDCQEXUoZj
好險我跟我同事回家的路是同一條,所以我一邊緩緩的牽著它回家,一邊罵著它這台竟然給主人熄火的50CC。627Please respect copyright.PENANATSr9hg3itT
627Please respect copyright.PENANARvkPQQbBS0
當然,出了社會還是沒有女朋友。627Please respect copyright.PENANAJ0baxfH4oC
627Please respect copyright.PENANAKiSQAChYE9
畢竟誰也不想當「笨蛋的女朋友」乃至於「笨蛋的老婆」吧。627Please respect copyright.PENANAP3zmduoOpC
627Please respect copyright.PENANALQToSMojQe
但叫坌但又不是我的錯!627Please respect copyright.PENANAFdmog2gvF2
627Please respect copyright.PENANADB7aCylUHa
我無聊環顧著新租來的房子──前一棟因為地震垮了,隔壁的房子頂多家具壞掉,偏偏就我的整棟垮掉──看到了我目前用不到,以後可能也用不到的雙人沙發。627Please respect copyright.PENANActG9YMo1qy
627Please respect copyright.PENANAfSeDPl4dcA
我打開筆電,百無聊賴的看著日本的動畫,也許我還是希望能夠像裡面的主角一樣,開個後宮吧?627Please respect copyright.PENANA3UaLgJPxzu
627Please respect copyright.PENANAH46PgrOG0S
不過那就叫「笨蛋的後宮」了,想到這裡,我竟然不自禁的笑了出來,笑到眼淚都飆了出來。627Please respect copyright.PENANA9tlLXL0A0L
627Please respect copyright.PENANAL4Y6cKCK5A
混帳,一個人的人生哪是名字能夠決定的啊!627Please respect copyright.PENANAcoeL5zo2Ao
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笨蛋與殺手
Author:
喂
ISSUE #1
1.主角登場
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