好痛。277Please respect copyright.PENANA0cyV7HoFMy
277Please respect copyright.PENANA2lyeq9PMo9
好痛,卻哭不出來。277Please respect copyright.PENANAA1KOpj44IS
277Please respect copyright.PENANAhtEpywRbho
眼淚會讓人迷路。自從爸爸離家後,媽媽總是會對我這麼說。277Please respect copyright.PENANAjbqrRD1Z3c
277Please respect copyright.PENANAw3lCOC7NWi
或許是因為如此,我才會忘了怎麼哭泣。277Please respect copyright.PENANAQMxfVGUyG3
277Please respect copyright.PENANALl777cYLHM
但,即使哭不出來,國一的那堂體育課,我的膝蓋仍綻開了血淋淋的傷口;而那位名叫艾瑪的同班同學,才會向呆坐在地上的我搭話。277Please respect copyright.PENANAst8KSlJpK3
277Please respect copyright.PENANAlNwbDArOnn
『你現在在哪裡?』277Please respect copyright.PENANA0MiTHptVc7
277Please respect copyright.PENANAJcbBCGqVIv
說出這句令人摸不著頭緒的話語的,是因為孤僻的個性而在班上被欺負過幾次的陰森少女。277Please respect copyright.PENANA9Ig0aKbSDR
277Please respect copyright.PENANA3B53ulKqYR
雖然不受歡迎,卻長得很漂亮。墨水似的柔軟黑色長髮、洋娃娃一樣的細緻五官、怕被發現一般的淡淡薰衣草香。277Please respect copyright.PENANAuGARoR2FtS
277Please respect copyright.PENANA2BqeUED6xR
她微微掀起裙角,露出左腳的膝蓋。277Please respect copyright.PENANAuREBlRp1mE
277Please respect copyright.PENANArTdht1GnPd
一塊紗布包裹著那裡。277Please respect copyright.PENANAbuoaGr3zWw
277Please respect copyright.PENANACyRfS1wJqN
『我們都在這裡呢,露娜。』她向我微笑。277Please respect copyright.PENANAR9trmBEEGP
277Please respect copyright.PENANA65rF9ZZFAr
如此怪異的說話方式,或許就是她會被欺負的原因吧。但我並不介意,因為我想我們在班上都一樣格格不入。277Please respect copyright.PENANA7nf4qzdO0u
277Please respect copyright.PENANADKLkBdbOGY
後來,她陪我一起到保健室。看見我沒有像其他同學一樣把她趕走,她似乎很開心。277Please respect copyright.PENANAH0h3U2q20h
277Please respect copyright.PENANAI4KhQAnqnW
從此以後,她變得只黏在我身邊。277Please respect copyright.PENANALGzoBpkCt2
277Please respect copyright.PENANAY87vrHA9NX
我發現我們有許多相似之處。除了都很安靜以外,我們還喜歡看書,也喜歡畫畫。277Please respect copyright.PENANAbyBPiM8tDP
277Please respect copyright.PENANALfQRdBNN2M
她買了一本筆記本,與我在上課時互傳、輪流塗鴉。我很喜歡艾瑪的塗鴉,她會畫她養的短毛貓高斯,以及她跟姐姐、媽媽——是的,我們都沒有爸爸。高斯這個名字是她姐姐取的,她的姐姐似乎很聰明,在鎮上的大學裡做大腦相關的研究。277Please respect copyright.PENANA1cemQsRFke
277Please respect copyright.PENANAKU5rPJ9BJs
轉眼間,我們就迎來國一升國二的暑假。放假後,我跟艾瑪常去不同地方玩,有時去逛書店,有時去看電影。277Please respect copyright.PENANAsPDNNsdXLC
277Please respect copyright.PENANAwg75LcCTmW
一次,我們去參觀科博館。那天艾瑪的話突然變得很多,到處向我介紹姐姐告訴過她的知識。277Please respect copyright.PENANAeoZ18xvHa7
277Please respect copyright.PENANAj4HTSPFRFX
我記得她站在科博館二樓的大腦模型前面,平時暗沉沉的眼睛閃閃發光。277Please respect copyright.PENANA0pXZKwy7Zg
277Please respect copyright.PENANAjWwaIQ4vKK
『露娜,你現在在哪裡?』她這麼問我。277Please respect copyright.PENANAaxYgMyJn4C
277Please respect copyright.PENANA07nTpecqS0
又是這個奇怪的問題。277Please respect copyright.PENANAdpuAlu3Bht
277Please respect copyright.PENANAW5Kn49FC08
她逕自接著說道,人們在某個時刻的思緒和感受,好比位在一張巨大地圖上的一個點;而那張地圖,解釋了我們從何而來,可以往哪裡去。277Please respect copyright.PENANAsG6PMAAUTM
277Please respect copyright.PENANAtCF7shdFH4
可惜,那張地圖不是平的,而是立體的,或4、5,甚至更高次元的,所以科學家暫時還找不到它。若是找到了,人們就能知道怎麼從這件事想到那件事,怎麼從高興走到難過,怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。277Please respect copyright.PENANAi48lZWGoOP
277Please respect copyright.PENANAdkaUrY5Gja
這些都是她姐姐告訴她的。當然,我一點也不知道她在說什麼。277Please respect copyright.PENANADPCaM3Q44D
277Please respect copyright.PENANAmcxACKBZxq
開學後,我們又度過了數週平平無奇的學校生活。277Please respect copyright.PENANAR63j6ShZjV
277Please respect copyright.PENANA4HtJrJZYnq
上課、塗鴉、放學時一起回家,一切都看似毫無異狀。277Please respect copyright.PENANAr7v7oRz4ZO
277Please respect copyright.PENANASNui0tAdOb
然而,隨著國二的尾聲到來,那件事情發生了。277Please respect copyright.PENANA00lf9s2ruv
277Please respect copyright.PENANATah3BtjXfj
高斯死了。277Please respect copyright.PENANAF2OUlqVMb2
277Please respect copyright.PENANAQwTPOxbeQy
這是在艾瑪因為難過而兩個禮拜都沒來學校後,才從她口中得知的事情。277Please respect copyright.PENANAfVOI0zFLxm
277Please respect copyright.PENANAinWSJKVxVt
『就因為這樣?』277Please respect copyright.PENANAM6uJtIk6Ux
277Please respect copyright.PENANA60tm3dcuMA
那節下課,站在艾瑪的座位前,我脫口而出這句話。277Please respect copyright.PENANAqsJ5mBcldo
277Please respect copyright.PENANAAS4Q1WqoML
我只是覺得她不因該讓自己那麼傷心。277Please respect copyright.PENANAfXpk6FuwsN
277Please respect copyright.PENANAShizbNbhiM
因為,眼淚會讓人迷路。277Please respect copyright.PENANAHS4UfWWeFh
277Please respect copyright.PENANACPuwgGJnwr
然而,艾瑪似乎無法理解我的意思。直到我看見她的臉垮下來,眼眶裡有淚水在打轉,我才知道我搞砸了。277Please respect copyright.PENANA7XAjXa03hc
277Please respect copyright.PENANA1n0MSjF5tq
後來,直到放暑假,她都沒有再來學校。我想了想,決定傳訊息向她道歉,但她只回了一次「沒關係」,就再也沒有回過我之後的訊息了。277Please respect copyright.PENANAbYwbCoYfRi
277Please respect copyright.PENANAlmMHw9bVF8
暑假過後,三年級的開學日,我再次遇見艾瑪。277Please respect copyright.PENANAufIvNvYi5S
277Please respect copyright.PENANAOJvpooSl9S
她的樣子變得古怪。她的眼神更加沒有生氣、更不愛說話,沒人知道她發生了什麼事。大家都避開她,而我也一直找不到機會跟她搭話,只能默默的觀察著她。那本筆記本上再也沒有新的塗鴉。277Please respect copyright.PENANADoete5oX1J
277Please respect copyright.PENANAyM2jdUSrn2
畢業後,我們又恰巧進入同一所高中。她就在我隔壁班。每次我經過,都會看見她一次比一次消瘦。277Please respect copyright.PENANA8M5XnmTn44
277Please respect copyright.PENANAEALQZtuXO0
不久後,他們班的傳聞就傳到我們班上,說她得了癌症、她被家人虐待、她被附身了。有一次,我在辦公室聽到老師們聊到艾瑪,說她好像去了奇怪的教會。277Please respect copyright.PENANAVKkLOsAZUb
277Please respect copyright.PENANAK8HWuQMpBZ
高二接近尾聲的一日放學,我經過他們班,看到裡面空空如也。在她的座位上,我看見有幾束鮮花和燒過的蠟燭擺在那。277Please respect copyright.PENANAwiFZyGeEv0
277Please respect copyright.PENANA50zvzggwFV
艾瑪去世了。277Please respect copyright.PENANATFAJORnVcT
277Please respect copyright.PENANALTwCFveKlB
她是DMT中毒致死的,DMT是一種毒品的樣子,鎮上的報導是這麼說的。我不知道艾瑪為什麼會吸毒,也不知道她從哪裡弄來這種毒藥。277Please respect copyright.PENANA7K5xiDntF7
277Please respect copyright.PENANAAmyXzZbX04
然而,我告訴自己不能哭,不能迷路。大家都得在自己的路上繼續前進。277Please respect copyright.PENANAvhQGG11QQ4
277Please respect copyright.PENANAgdvwT1YOKl
上課、作業、考試,一成不變的生活因此繼續運轉著,隔壁班似乎也一下子就忘了她。277Please respect copyright.PENANA8bkSE2U4rZ
277Please respect copyright.PENANAre9LOEJJFw
但,就在放假前一週的生物課上,老師跟我們分享了一個科學上的新發現。277Please respect copyright.PENANAlclNkZ7lvV
277Please respect copyright.PENANAFrdOByXAUd
他說科學家發現了一個多達數千億維的空間。這個空間記錄了人類大腦任何可能的思想狀態。科學家稱這個空間「意識宇宙」。277Please respect copyright.PENANASlNd6rsWTe
277Please respect copyright.PENANAvOZI4ofrGO
當下,我想起了去科博館玩的那次,艾瑪所說的那張巨大地圖,還有怎麼從高興走到難過、怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。277Please respect copyright.PENANAYkOutr0HvI
277Please respect copyright.PENANAR8kwedKUqG
我感到一陣反胃。在以內急當藉口離開教室後,我跑向廁所。277Please respect copyright.PENANAwKglRRhCOh
277Please respect copyright.PENANAwhVC2EGFLM
跑著跑著,跟艾瑪有關的回憶不斷湧現。277Please respect copyright.PENANAH4Pt3zaWDV
277Please respect copyright.PENANAT5vxr6Yfsz
首先,是我與艾瑪的最後一次對話。那時的我只是希望艾瑪不要因為難過而迷失了,但我現在卻隱約明白,有什麼注定讓艾瑪流淚。277Please respect copyright.PENANAC9JOuGSSPn
277Please respect copyright.PENANAtZHKOHvvxk
接著,是我們經歷過的種種。艾瑪和我暑假時常去的書店,艾瑪在筆記本上的塗鴉,還有艾瑪在那堂體育課向我說的那句話。277Please respect copyright.PENANAj1gSRbXMS4
277Please respect copyright.PENANAq3aeCg7qPy
我頓時恍然大悟。艾瑪讓我看她膝蓋的傷,並不是想說我們受傷的地方一樣——277Please respect copyright.PENANAl4jAMtHOj5
277Please respect copyright.PENANAbYfXSD22TG
而是想告訴我,在那張以數億個維度所描繪的地圖上,我們在同一個地方。277Please respect copyright.PENANAReZPxYchAu
277Please respect copyright.PENANAyrzLpxCheY
我們一樣痛。277Please respect copyright.PENANAhTD0OlgQFB
277Please respect copyright.PENANA0gGJe3qbhg
——我現在在哪裡?277Please respect copyright.PENANAZfRD3Hd25k
277Please respect copyright.PENANANsho3419hf
好痛。277Please respect copyright.PENANAkcHxOQOp4m
277Please respect copyright.PENANAjym8OyPRSa
好痛,卻哭不出來。277Please respect copyright.PENANA1iArytcFF9
277Please respect copyright.PENANA2f4TjCGqZw
胸口就像膝蓋那時的傷口一樣刺痛;我停步在走廊上,難受的蹲下。277Please respect copyright.PENANADp7MvMBamI
277Please respect copyright.PENANARHq0sq5ZnT
我好希望當我抬頭時,能看見艾瑪對我微笑。277Please respect copyright.PENANA3Fw5KhL1F6
277Please respect copyright.PENANAnQ36o8OHsr
但,倘若她還活著,或許只會回我一句「就因為這樣」。277Please respect copyright.PENANAwTDLwLIRjW
277Please respect copyright.PENANA2v8q3A6Mvj
好痛,好憤怒。277Please respect copyright.PENANAyVZR7Md2rS
277Please respect copyright.PENANAJjzflKlDWM
艾瑪迷失時,我拋棄了她。277Please respect copyright.PENANAzXbDHOrJtx
277Please respect copyright.PENANAl7tarkfbse
我就這樣放手了,導致了這場悲劇。277Please respect copyright.PENANAmdgHtE6Fdn
277Please respect copyright.PENANAA8UkBVavMN
艾瑪死後,我仍假裝自己沒有迷路。277Please respect copyright.PENANAVzXvQUh9SU
277Please respect copyright.PENANAfQ2X9M2xM2
假裝不珍惜她,作為我曾經最好的朋友。277Please respect copyright.PENANAw7eKTMsCUy
277Please respect copyright.PENANAKjBw3RH46B
突然,彷彿不留給我任何喘息的餘地一般,我的手機傳來震動。277Please respect copyright.PENANAkLtUGeFSUO
277Please respect copyright.PENANAZ9QihcoTqr
我懺抖著從口袋中拿出手機,將恍惚的目光投向螢幕。277Please respect copyright.PENANAkHetjv9GzE
277Please respect copyright.PENANACkmgRzZieh
我看見通知欄顯示的屬名和訊息內容。一時之間,我所有的思緒都停滯了。277Please respect copyright.PENANA7gHcv1isqj
277Please respect copyright.PENANArZ0CUqePjU
『艾瑪:』277Please respect copyright.PENANArygsO5iMDg
277Please respect copyright.PENANAbfmh0rwNJb
『來地圖上找我。』277Please respect copyright.PENANAdVzJu9FEo9
277Please respect copyright.PENANAwv6NYWUkU2