晚安了,媽媽260Please respect copyright.PENANAmuOMBbRMac
Good night, mom260Please respect copyright.PENANAD8LhgiHgLc
260Please respect copyright.PENANARJUUjgkC7b
さよなら260Please respect copyright.PENANAMeV8L1Q4Ml
再見了260Please respect copyright.PENANA5xRsVyQ0rw
Goodbye260Please respect copyright.PENANAlMqyhOOlNz
260Please respect copyright.PENANA7dOZogrBRM
260Please respect copyright.PENANA46rNc7oPIL
260Please respect copyright.PENANAP5J6rXDHA9
在最接近平安也是最接近瘋狂的器官
裏頭住了一隻蠻不講理的怪物
流著冰冷的血
它正是和理性作對的想法
「反正結果不會改變」
我在打一場毫無勝算的仗
而這個對手日益壯大的同時
堅持下去的決心也在漸漸消逝
理所當然地
反抗著的愚者總有一天會被之殺死吧
260Please respect copyright.PENANA78iRpTBwcx
不再期望與作夢的原因是什麼時候忘記的呢
「沒有了生存意義的話
我還是我嗎」
如此類推的自我質疑在心中多不勝數
只是質疑若能得到解答
我也不需要淪落到這等瘋狂
這是一道不可能解答的問題
因為自相矛盾
是矛和盾的偽命題
雖則如此
消極的心底話
自我厭惡轉化而成的自我質疑
的確可以逆轉回去
彷如化學作用的原理
而在沉思的環境下
一靜下來
當情緒沉澱下來
一切也會變得清晰
源於森林的聲音
它們在說什麼
它們的每一言每一語
「這全都是你的錯」
「這全都是我的錯」
其實不難發現
自己為什麼一直在為難自己
瘋了
我早已瘋了
我的思維早已被創傷侵佔
我無法分辨什麼選擇能夠拯救自己
抑或是兩者之間有什麼分別
黑和白
生和死
正義不正義
反正是一樣
結果會是一樣
反正無論怎選擇
結局也只會有一個
我這樣想法奇怪嗎
還是說這樣子想才正常
才合乎理論
畢竟命運和自由只有一者可以存在
而我確實是瘋了
記得那時
在我還沒有瘋掉的時候
簡單不過的日子
在我還未擁抱無知的時候
我曾經幸福過
然後那天來了
連冬天和夏天也判斷不到
究竟錯的是我
還是錯在這個夏天會下雪的世界
我會說大概是太寒冷的問題
記得
曾經有一個為我不惜一切的人
她是這麼溫柔這麼堅強
是這麼溫暖
她的笑容
她的懷抱在記憶中如此深刻
只是醒來後身體有點僵冷了260Please respect copyright.PENANAXFYLP71rqF
260Please respect copyright.PENANAdinDUBq4Py
ns216.73.216.190da2 260Please respect copyright.PENANAdinDUBq4Py
Within the flesh which lies on the long bed, which dips toward the shadow of chaos and peace was absent from260Please respect copyright.PENANAFVW6NjQr4E
There was a raging monster that knows nothing but the word "cruel" with all its vile heart260Please respect copyright.PENANA0lxtQxh6j7
The cold-blooded beasts was the vicious voice that killed my rational self260Please respect copyright.PENANAez4jaW7SbQ
Keep yelling to me, "Nothing will change despite your pain"260Please respect copyright.PENANA68zgoKLJ8g
It is a losing battle that I must fight, yet the nightmare of that day always frightens me260Please respect copyright.PENANAnIisw0rgFj
Acknowledging that one day I will eventually succumb to the madness breed inside me260Please respect copyright.PENANA1Fp6LZvmFk
As this dreamland is only fertile for necrotic thoughts but not dandelions of hopes260Please respect copyright.PENANAjdCtyvr07k
One day, I will be killed by myself
260Please respect copyright.PENANArOFWSV6YZhThere was a raging monster that knows nothing but the word "cruel" with all its vile heart260Please respect copyright.PENANA0lxtQxh6j7
The cold-blooded beasts was the vicious voice that killed my rational self260Please respect copyright.PENANAez4jaW7SbQ
Keep yelling to me, "Nothing will change despite your pain"260Please respect copyright.PENANA68zgoKLJ8g
It is a losing battle that I must fight, yet the nightmare of that day always frightens me260Please respect copyright.PENANAnIisw0rgFj
Acknowledging that one day I will eventually succumb to the madness breed inside me260Please respect copyright.PENANA1Fp6LZvmFk
As this dreamland is only fertile for necrotic thoughts but not dandelions of hopes260Please respect copyright.PENANAjdCtyvr07k
One day, I will be killed by myself
When did I forgot to remember to forget ?260Please respect copyright.PENANAjKwj9xNWh2
Forget to reason with myself to never dream again, never wish again260Please respect copyright.PENANAQEowjZDVii
Yet, the true question which kept me away from the wonderland was never answered260Please respect copyright.PENANAmZHWlR3cW9
"Does one who loses their purpose to live on, count as losing themselves as well?"260Please respect copyright.PENANAnHCgrxOSG1
Meaningless questions such as these exists only to fill the empty space of my mind260Please respect copyright.PENANAZqN0TBzGdX
Stuffed my brain to avoid giving room for insanity to take root 260Please respect copyright.PENANARBS2zakoNr
However, if I really wanted to260Please respect copyright.PENANAQZBIeuX4cG
I can answer those ramblings260Please respect copyright.PENANAvDaQpNRjlZ
As easy as conducting an experiment260Please respect copyright.PENANAt7tHB7qNik
Reminding myself of chemical reaction can be reversible260Please respect copyright.PENANA6qo530DqaC
My self-hatred can be reversed back to self-questioning260Please respect copyright.PENANAwtU2rEymyG
I can listen to the sound of truth, echoing from the depths of the forest
260Please respect copyright.PENANAlsWUsQ63FcForget to reason with myself to never dream again, never wish again260Please respect copyright.PENANAQEowjZDVii
Yet, the true question which kept me away from the wonderland was never answered260Please respect copyright.PENANAmZHWlR3cW9
"Does one who loses their purpose to live on, count as losing themselves as well?"260Please respect copyright.PENANAnHCgrxOSG1
Meaningless questions such as these exists only to fill the empty space of my mind260Please respect copyright.PENANAZqN0TBzGdX
Stuffed my brain to avoid giving room for insanity to take root 260Please respect copyright.PENANARBS2zakoNr
However, if I really wanted to260Please respect copyright.PENANAQZBIeuX4cG
I can answer those ramblings260Please respect copyright.PENANAvDaQpNRjlZ
As easy as conducting an experiment260Please respect copyright.PENANAt7tHB7qNik
Reminding myself of chemical reaction can be reversible260Please respect copyright.PENANA6qo530DqaC
My self-hatred can be reversed back to self-questioning260Please respect copyright.PENANAwtU2rEymyG
I can listen to the sound of truth, echoing from the depths of the forest
"This is all your fault"260Please respect copyright.PENANARGBc8GrhqP
"This is all my fault"260Please respect copyright.PENANAgP6ARKhHT0
The results was always there, which I just swept it under the bed260Please respect copyright.PENANA0KiXTVHMqV
I have already gone crazy and mad260Please respect copyright.PENANAcuDPEhZGHO
As trauma devoured my sanity and heart, the pain was so unbearable I lied to myself260Please respect copyright.PENANAdubjAd6bJM
"It is alright"260Please respect copyright.PENANA9N4OO3p3Hn
And it became alright for me260Please respect copyright.PENANA3aeHajCczv
With the cost of the ability to tell what is right or wrong, to decide what is justice and sins, to see what is the difference between me and them260Please respect copyright.PENANAtwDqV0aqtM
My says in choices were all it takes to continue on this lonesome path260Please respect copyright.PENANA1z1jr0UaK9
Though, does it matter anymore ?260Please respect copyright.PENANAfNXY1we8tk
If the past, the present, and the future was already well decided back then ?260Please respect copyright.PENANAkT7cJd39Y0
As my author said, I could not live happily ever after260Please respect copyright.PENANAugwTvq4fPn
260Please respect copyright.PENANA49yhkwDe1g
Am I the weird one here? 260Please respect copyright.PENANAuoluCcp2Ma
Please tell me, or is it just the voice inside my head trying to play tricks on me260Please respect copyright.PENANA32IKp7gOgz
Am I the wrong one here?260Please respect copyright.PENANAtVeU4MhTNy
Thinking that "Freedom" and "Fate" are not things that can coexist260Please respect copyright.PENANAfgXWcWD1Pq
Please help me, since nothing I can do can bring my senses back260Please respect copyright.PENANAASk6KHfZtt
I have already lost it all
260Please respect copyright.PENANAnhThEVBBlC"This is all my fault"260Please respect copyright.PENANAgP6ARKhHT0
The results was always there, which I just swept it under the bed260Please respect copyright.PENANA0KiXTVHMqV
I have already gone crazy and mad260Please respect copyright.PENANAcuDPEhZGHO
As trauma devoured my sanity and heart, the pain was so unbearable I lied to myself260Please respect copyright.PENANAdubjAd6bJM
"It is alright"260Please respect copyright.PENANA9N4OO3p3Hn
And it became alright for me260Please respect copyright.PENANA3aeHajCczv
With the cost of the ability to tell what is right or wrong, to decide what is justice and sins, to see what is the difference between me and them260Please respect copyright.PENANAtwDqV0aqtM
My says in choices were all it takes to continue on this lonesome path260Please respect copyright.PENANA1z1jr0UaK9
Though, does it matter anymore ?260Please respect copyright.PENANAfNXY1we8tk
If the past, the present, and the future was already well decided back then ?260Please respect copyright.PENANAkT7cJd39Y0
As my author said, I could not live happily ever after260Please respect copyright.PENANAugwTvq4fPn
260Please respect copyright.PENANA49yhkwDe1g
Am I the weird one here? 260Please respect copyright.PENANAuoluCcp2Ma
Please tell me, or is it just the voice inside my head trying to play tricks on me260Please respect copyright.PENANA32IKp7gOgz
Am I the wrong one here?260Please respect copyright.PENANAtVeU4MhTNy
Thinking that "Freedom" and "Fate" are not things that can coexist260Please respect copyright.PENANAfgXWcWD1Pq
Please help me, since nothing I can do can bring my senses back260Please respect copyright.PENANAASk6KHfZtt
I have already lost it all
Still, the cloudy memory tells me the same story every night260Please respect copyright.PENANADWa3mfCR2A
A fairy tale set long before the time I had gone mad260Please respect copyright.PENANAdN6sLeOxMs
Days without worry and doubts260Please respect copyright.PENANAIsJMQdXx49
Times that are as pure as crystal clear260Please respect copyright.PENANAqNJR1UfxFA
I was happy before260Please respect copyright.PENANAGzVegMq2nd
And on that day, when the light went off260Please respect copyright.PENANALLGL83BolR
And when you cannot tell whether it is summer or winter260Please respect copyright.PENANAtka9cHx05s
In that ridiculous world, where it snows in summer260Please respect copyright.PENANAxfWfge5omi
I forgot whose fault it was for me to lose everything260Please respect copyright.PENANA2TAMnm7X4O
Thus I guess I will just foolishly blame the terrible weather then260Please respect copyright.PENANAwbY6WzLCmm
There was someone who love me260Please respect copyright.PENANAEMlWS9DI7J
Taught me unconditional love260Please respect copyright.PENANAakJrpUKajH
She was strong, kind and lovely
A fairy tale set long before the time I had gone mad260Please respect copyright.PENANAdN6sLeOxMs
Days without worry and doubts260Please respect copyright.PENANAIsJMQdXx49
Times that are as pure as crystal clear260Please respect copyright.PENANAqNJR1UfxFA
I was happy before260Please respect copyright.PENANAGzVegMq2nd
And on that day, when the light went off260Please respect copyright.PENANALLGL83BolR
And when you cannot tell whether it is summer or winter260Please respect copyright.PENANAtka9cHx05s
In that ridiculous world, where it snows in summer260Please respect copyright.PENANAxfWfge5omi
I forgot whose fault it was for me to lose everything260Please respect copyright.PENANA2TAMnm7X4O
Thus I guess I will just foolishly blame the terrible weather then260Please respect copyright.PENANAwbY6WzLCmm
There was someone who love me260Please respect copyright.PENANAEMlWS9DI7J
Taught me unconditional love260Please respect copyright.PENANAakJrpUKajH
She was strong, kind and lovely
And her smile was warm like the sun260Please respect copyright.PENANAl6u3lIzrPG
I wished to wake up in her embrace every morning
I wished to wake up in her embrace every morning
260Please respect copyright.PENANADxn12jhXIO
Yet her hands were cold that morning260Please respect copyright.PENANAnnIJl8mI1v